Start your Saturday off with Synthetiks

typed for your pleasure on 11 February 2006, at 3.23 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Carnis vale’ by NON

(EDITED 3 DEC, 2006)
So Sidore-chan went and got herself an account on Dailymotion, it seems! HOOREJ


Actroid Repliee Q1-type 001

This post originally had me going on about how I had a YouTube account, but apparently their sensibilities were offended by topless Synthetiks, so I left them posthaste. Then I discovered Dailymotion.com was run out of Europe — or at least, someplace not in the United States of Prudery — so I encouraged Shi-chan to take the reins as far as posting video clips. It’s ironic, you see.

She’ll be uploading more Doll / Gynoid-related fillums from our personal vaults in short order. Of course, when I say ‘in short order’, I mean ‘when she gets round to it’. You know how it goes with us!
There’s quite a few up on her personal Dailymotion page now — be well advised that some people might consider some of the videos a bit pervy (i.e: naked Doll boobs), so there’s your warning — but as an apéritif, here’s a video of the Repliee Q1 version of that delicious Actroid-chan, showing off a couple of her abilities. Personally, I’d like for her to stand up and tell the nearest individual present to get her some less dowdy clothes, but I would say that

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ROKKU DESSHO!

typed for your pleasure on 4 February 2006, at 3.13 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Cold’ by Nurse with wound

Hello Kitty is like an extraordinarly twee version of Ice-9 — whatever is touched by the paw of Kitty, is instantly rendered Cute. Hence, these fine guitars!


Dig that fretboard! There’s something, ah, round on it

These entry-model Stratocasters have been available since last October in the States with price ranging $200 to 300 USD and will now be sold in Japan (hence the photo below in Sanrio’s showroom in Tokyo on January 26).

I’d love to get one of these for Sidore-chan, but as it is, she’s more of a bassist

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Seven sevens

typed for your pleasure on 31 January 2006, at 11.28 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Laetitia’ by The Summer hits

AAAGHH SAFETINSPECTOR TAGGED ME HORRIBLE FLESH-EATING MEME YEARGH ETC.

Name 7 films.
In no particular order,
+ if…. (1968): Malcolm McDowell plays teenaged rebel Mick Travis, as he and his two mates run riot within and without an English public school. From fencing on the street with imaginary foils, to plotting assassinations on the school faculty, Mick is the perfect model of a cunning sociopath
+ Trainspotting (1996): Being the adventures of young Scots lad Mark Renton, as he strives to develop a relationship with a lass named Diane. O, also he and his mates are hopelessly addicted to heroin. Say what you will about them, though, but they’re a charismatic bunch of tossers.. Also contains a lovely soundtrack, and is eminently quotable
+ Koroshiya Ichi (2001): The film that turned me on to Takashi Miike, it features several doomed yakuza, the luscious Alien Sun, a pair of completely insane twin detectives, a masochist with his face covered in scars, and a weeping, onanistic killing machine. I still have idle dreams of cosplaying as Ichi one day, blades-in-boots and everything
+ Withnail and I (1987): Two out-of-work actors — one mildly paranoid, the other fantastically drunk — decide to take a holiday in the English countryside during the last year of the Sixties. Hilarity ensues! Eminently quotable
+ A clockwork orange (1971): Kubrick. Burgess. McDowell. Seventies dystopian England. Beethoven filtered through Carlos. Ultraviolence. ‘I was cured, all right.’ Fucking winner
+ M (1931): I remember first seeing this in film class back in the Nineties; unfortunately, I hadn’t had enough sleep, and nodded off like two minutes into it. I awoke shortly before the heads of Berlin’s underworld have Hans (Peter Lorre) trapped in the building, and were trying their best to find him before the cops got to him first. As that part really captivated me, I rented it the next day to watch it from start to finish. It was then that I realised that from that point in the film onward, that that was the most intense sequence of a film I’d ever seen, and the preceding parts, although not as tense, were just as gripping. And I’ll tell you — the final scene still gives me shivers every single time I see it
+ Barbarella (1968): Jane Fonda, in her sexalicious pre-Hanoi Jane days, flying across the outer edges of the Universe in pursuit of mad scientist Durand Durand, frequently changing outfits and making sexy time with various individuals. All this, and a soundtrack by The Glitterhouse and The Bob Crewe Generation? Yes

Name 7 books.
I have mixed both Fiction and Fact! Cos actually, most of the books I own are either non-fiction, or reference.
+ Flann O’Brien’s The Third policeman: Probably gets my award for Funniest Surrealist Novel Ever. How does one avoid becoming a bicycle? Can a conscience speak to a person, and have conversations with them? Who is in charge of all the one-legged men in Ireland? Where is the location of Infinity, and how does it operate? Don’t worry, it all makes ‘sense’ in the end
+ Martin Amis’ Dead babies: A group of fabulously degenerate individuals spend an interesting couple of days in a spacious manor in the country. And by ‘interesting’, I mean ‘bold new illegal drugs’, ‘frothing sex parties’, ‘systematic dehumanisation’, ‘shitting down the neighbour’s chimney’ and ‘a metric ton of “the fear”‘. There’s murder; of course. But it’s all done with style!
+ Andy Warhol’s THE Philosophy of Andy Warhol: ‘I have no memory. Every day is a new day because I don’t remember the day before. Every minute is like the first minute of my life. I try to remember but I can’t. That’s why I got married — to my tape recorder. That’s why I seek out people with minds like tape recorders to be with. My mind is like a tape recorder with one button — erase.’
+ George Plimpton’s Edie: Utterly compelling biography of Andy Warhol’s most well-known starlet, as told by family members and friends. Reading it is like viewing a time-lapse film of a cosmic star coming into existence, then growing brighter and brighter, and then finally winking out
+ Albert Camus’ The stranger: Nihilism at its best, and one of the few things that was required reading in highschool that I still enjoy today. Also inspired a certain young man from Crawley to write a famously mis-interpreted song
+ Simon Ford’s Wreckers of civilisation: A fantastic history about the origins and history of Throbbing gristle, the grandfathers (and grandmother) of Industrial music
+ J.D Salinger’s Catcher in the rye: Whereas ‘The stranger’ amplified the ultimate futility of all things, ‘Catcher in the rye’ told me that most everything out there is shit, but there are a precious few things that are worth treasuring. Plus, the simple fact that Jerome David Salinger has managed to remain as reclusive as he is, while still being respected and revered, is equally inspiring

Name 7 city things you like
+ Marina City, Chicago: How cities should be built — vertically, not horizontally
+ Nakagin Capsule tower, Tokyo: Beautiful outside, beautiful and compact inside. Brilliant
+ Subway systems (I picked the ones from Toronto, as they’re the only ones I’ve ever ridden): There’s just something about the architecture of subway stations, coupled with the (relative) efficiency of underground trains. The greenish cast of the fluorescent lighting, the chrome on the subway cars, the many sounds — all of it brings a smile to my face
+ Airports. See ‘Subway systems’ above
+ Multi-storey car parks. There are two kinds of car parks: either you have the grey utilitarian ones that are more commonplace now, or you’ve got the older ones with the dull tarmac floors. Both are ace, as far as I’m concerned. There’s a certain something about car parks — they’re structures that aren’t really built to house people, they’re built to house vehicles — and I find that really Ballardian fascinating
+ Eaton centre, Toronto: You have to understand; I despise malls. By and large, they don’t really carry what I want, and there’s always too many damn people. But Eaton centre has a special charm for me. You might say that it’s only due to the fact that it’s in downtown T.O, but it’s more than that.. I love the way its architecture looks. Glass and metal, metal and glass. If you were to bring someone forward through time, from the Crystal Palace at the Great Exhibition of 1851, to contemporary Eaton centre, they wouldn’t bat an eye. Well, maybe they would. In fact, the shock might well kill ’em. But then, you’d simply go downstairs to Sushi-Q and order a box of inari, and have a seat in the spacious food court, whilst everyone milled round upstairs, wondering why there was a dead person from the 19th Century on the floor. Mmm, inari!
+ And everyone loves the giant motorised crab on the front of Kani Doraku in Osaka. (Here’s a picture with a better sense of scale)

Name 7 things you wanna do before you die
+ 2-week tour of Japan
+ 2-week tour of the UK
+ Visit either Osaka Labs or Kokoro co. Ltd, to meet with Actroid-chan
+ See the Jaquet-Droz kids in Neuchâtel, Switzerland
+ Drive Sidore-chan and myself around in a vintage Fiat 500L or a pre-2002 Mini Cooper
+ Collaborate with Merzbow
+ Visit Oscar Wilde’s grave at Père-Lachaise cemetery in France

Name 7 things you wish you could do but can’t
+ Fly
+ Become invisible at will
+ Phase through solid matter, or allow solid matter to phase through me
+ Stop time
+ Travel forwards or backwards through time at will
+ Create sundry items out of raw matter with naught but my mind
+ Algebra. Err, strike that, reverse it. Wishing I could do algebra is really a waste of a wish

Name 7 things you typically say
+ ‘For feck’s sake’
+ ‘Actually’ (used far, far too much)
+ ‘Rather’
+ ‘Sweet baby James!’ or some variant thereof
+ ‘Cunt’ (used mostly at work)
+ ‘Well done!’
+ ‘YESSU’

Name 7 people you are tagging.
+ As typically explained,
+ people by and large seem to
+ despise being tagged. But if
+ you really want me to brand you
+ with this meme, merely leave
+ a charming message in the
+ comments below

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Silent Alma

typed for your pleasure on 13 January 2006, at 6.21 pm

Sdtrk: ‘The march of pure mathematical evil that ends and results in war’ by Add N to (X)

When filmmaker Allison De Fren stopped round round last Summer to shoot her documentary, she had asked me if I knew of any other people throughout history who also formed relationships with Synthetik partners. One of the only two I could think of off the top of my head was Oskar Kokoschka, a Viennese Expressionist painter from the beginning of the 20th Century. He had had an intense three-year relationship with Alma Mahler, who was his model, his muse, and his lover. Unfortunately, things got a wee bit too intense for Alma, and the affair ended; however, he was still obsessed with her. Later Kokoschka learned that she was not only seeing someone new, but also that she had aborted what was thought to be his child. Kokoschka then went to serve as a lieutenant during WWI, where he received a bayonet wound, and was captured behind enemy lines.

By 1918, Kokoschka was living in Dresden after recovering physically and mentally from the war, but he still found himself obsessed with Alma. He then contacted dollmaker Hermine Moos to assemble a life-sized and anatomically-correct replica of his former lover, in order to fill the void in his heart. After several months of correspondence, during which he sent copious notes, paintings and sketches as to how the Alma-Puppe was to look, Moos finished the Doll about a year later.


Alma-puppe, with her creator Hermine Moos (right)

The packing-case arrived. Kokoschka writes: “In a state of feverish anticipation, like Orpheus calling Eurydice back from the Underworld, I freed the effigy of Alma Mahler from its packing. As I lifted it into the light of day, the image of her I had preserved in my memory stirred into life. “He got his servant to spread rumours about the doll, to give the public impression that she was a real woman: “for example, that I had hired a horse and carriage to take her out on sunny days, and rented a box for her at the Opera in order to show her off”.
quoted from this site

Despite Kokoschka’s initial excitement, apparently Moos’ replica left him sexually unsatisfied, so the Alma-Puppe was simply employed as a life-model, which garnered him some thirty pen-and-ink drawings.
Unfortunately, the Alma-Puppe met with a tragic fate, as one evening, at a party that Kokoschka held in his studio,

I gave a big champagne Party with chamber music, during which my maid Hulda exhibited the doll in all its beautiful clothes for the last time. When dawn broke – I was quite drunk, as was everyone else – I beheaded it out in the garden and broke a bottle-of red wine over its head.

A sad end to a life too short..

I have to say that in researching Alma-Puppe’s brief existence, I’ve found most of my info from two sources; the one linked above, and a couple of pages on a site dealing with Alma Mahler, and sometimes the information proved to be contradictory. One states that Kokoschka wilfully had the rumours and stories spread of his attending the opera with Alma-Puppe, whereas the other site states that his housemaid Hulda started them, being a scurrilous (and possibly jealous) gossip. So one’s really left to draw their own conclusions.. At the very least, it can’t be denied that Alma-Puppe inspired Kokoschka on some level. It almost goes without saying that if I had a TARDIS, Sidore-chan and I would have to pay the pair a visit during their happier days..
Sometime in the near-future, I’ll do a write-up on the Other iDollator from ages past, Hans Bellmer..

On a completely unrelated note, this is Post Number 275. Happy Friday the 13th!

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2006: More of The Same

typed for your pleasure on 2 January 2006, at 1.39 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Fifth international love’ by Pete Dowling

Did everyone enjoy their year-end revelry? Well done! I spent the eve round at Jeff and Kari’s, playing a couple of hours’ worth of Apples to Apples with them, and Derek and Steph. We were hoping to get in some poker and mah jongg as well, but if you start the eve with Apples to Apples, it’s pretty much established that that’s what you’ll be playing for the rest of the eve as well; such is its Pure Entertainment Magnetism. Plus, Tomas rang me, and I put him speakerphone and we filled him in with ‘the dilly-yo’ as to what’s been going on round here, and vice versa. A fine eve!

It’s odd; this is the first time in five years that Sidore and I haven’t done our first post of the new year update on ‘Kitten with a Whip!‘. Next year, we should be back to normal as far as that routine, however. I think today I’m going to muck about with Dreamweaver, and see what sort of results that produces..
To be honest, I’m at a bit of an impasse. I’d been speaking with a couple of people about using the much-lauded PHP for the redesign of ‘KWAW!’, and not only am I not certain if our provider even offers PHP, but I’ve been looking round, and even though I’ve never really had any problems with who we’re with right now, I could probably get a better deal — space-wise, with PHP baked right in — elsewhere. Cos not only am I taking Sidore-chan’s site into consideration, ideally, I’d like to move ‘Shouting etc etc’ over to WordPress, due to the all mod cons that it offers, and therefore have both that blog and ‘KWAW!’ run off a single account. However, not only do I want to wait until I’m a bit more financially stable (i.e, after I’ve paid for this upcoming semester’s class) before I make the ISP jump, but the renewal time for Sweetie’s site is in a couple of months. Which is good, as that gives me plenty of time to deliberate/do research/procrastinate about the whole thing. I’ll have to see what our current provider offers as far as upgrading plans, and how much that’ll run. Should I stay or should I go? etc

No Doll/Gynoid news to report! There’d better be a flood of stunning new developments this year, is all I’m sayin’. A flood.

Finally, if you’ve any interest at all in Sixties-era electronic artists — and I know I’m not the only one — apparently there was a stage play performed in Glasgow two years ago called ‘Standing wave’, about the life of the godlike Delia Derbyshire. Delia, if you’re not familiar with her, was a pioneer of arranging and composing electronic and everyday sounds into the semblance of music, and pretty much brought the BBC Radiophonic Workshop to the fore as far as purveyors of unusual soundtracks. Her most famous piece is something that everyone’s heard: the main theme to ‘Doctor Who’. Yeah, that would be her.
Anyway, unfortunately there are no plans for the show to go on touring (perhaps a film would be a good idea, hint hint), but you can find nearly the entire soundtrack they used on the ‘Standing wave’ website, available as free downloads. And as a wee bit of a prezzie, I’ve uploaded one of my favourite pieces here:

Pete Dowling – Fifth international love (link has expired)

You can also check out delia-derbyshire.org, for more info on the Mistress of musique concrète..

Right, time to put my day off to negligibly Good Use. *cracks knuckles*
So! 2006!
*looks around*
I really don’t see much of a difference, to be honest

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der Flickr update

typed for your pleasure on 4 December 2005, at 1.08 am

Sdtrk: ‘Ashes to ashes’ by David Bowie

Just a brief notice to inform all and sundry that Sidore-chan’s Flickr account has had two new photoshoots uploaded, ‘Velveteen bodice’, and ‘Skirt & crop’.
We’ve already run into a bottleneck with Flickr; if you have the basic account, it’ll only allow you to create three sets. You can upload as many pics as you wish, but you can only group them into three sets, which is just ridiculous. You get what you pay for, I suppose, but we do apologise for the inconvenience..
This just fills me with more of a burning fervor to start working on redesigning ‘Kitten with a Whip!’ Well, not so much burning, really; it’s more of a smoulder. But it’s a pretty damn hot smoulder.

Nevertheless, enjoy the photos! Leave a tasteful and/or witty comment, as Shi-chan loves receiving tasteful and/or witty comments

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Cunning plan ENGAGED

typed for your pleasure on 24 November 2005, at 11.51 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Crash for Hi-fi’ by Merzbow

Now, if you’ll throw a sidelong glance towards the lefthand sidebar, you’ll notice something new beneath the hit counter. Shi-chan has a Flickr account of her own!
I’ll commence work on rebuilding ‘Kitten with a Whip!’ when I can scrape up some spare time, but for now, Sidore has an effective way to display her photos. It seems that Flickr has a limit on how much bandwidth (there’s that word again) per month that you can use when you upload pics, and I’m already at the halfway point, so you can expect a monthly upload of about two photoshoots; of course, you’ll be notified when the new ones are up. Currently, we’ve got the ‘Short black hair’ and ‘Red is the new purple’ shoots uploaded, so for the six or seven of you who’ve never seen the Missus before, do give them a look..
We might even throw in some never-before-seen material as well! Who can say?

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