Sdtrk: ‘Heaven sent’ by Josef K

A couple of nights ago, I’d dreamt I was at a Doll Parliament* in upper Ontario, where the hosts had two Rottweilers. At some point I was leaving the livingroom to step outside for a smoke — a Djarum, naturally — and the dogs, as they tend to do, got startled, and they each leapt at me and clamped onto my ears. Both of the hosts had to remove them (one host per dog), but unfortunately I lost my ears… I remember seeing one of them, neatly removed and unmangled, lying face-up on the blue pile carpeting. It’s almost as if they detached, which really was the most amusing thing under the circumstances.

There aren’t a lot of people who will dig this post, but I have a confession: overall, I’m not really keen on dogs. They’re fine from a great distance away, but I am not a dog person. I don’t really like how dogs possess an unending torrent of nervous, excitable, and unpredictable energy. To be fair, I prefer to not be around humans who are like that for long periods of time, either, but at least if you tell a person ‘hey, let’s… bring it down a notch,’ they’ll understand you, which is more than I can say for dogs. But as someone who prefers his environs to be quiet 95% of the time, having to put up with the sounds of running, or jumping, or scampering, let alone barking, is not my idea of a good time.

More pressing of a dislike for me is that dogs tend to be filthy most of the time. It’s understandable; these are creatures that glean a lot of information through what they can smell, but to those of us who are semi-recovering germophobes, they’re frankly kinda disgusting. Constantly rolling around in dirt and mud, all that shedding, rooting through rubbish face-first — and then licking your face — all that peeing and pooping, sticking their noses up other dogs’ bums, the leg-humping… I don’t need to go on; you’ve encountered a dog or two, I’m sure, so you’re familiar with their work. Their behaviour puts me in mind of that blurb The Onion ran a few years ago, ‘Area Dog’s Rock Bottom Same As His Peak‘. That’s not satire, that’s fact. To me, outside stops at our front door (well, the foyer), whereas to a dog, the world is their room, and those differences between us are irreconcilable.

Now I understand that genetically speaking, dogs are territorial, and when humans domesticated them, trained them to be protective of their owners’ territory, but all I’m saying is that they don’t have to be aggressive and in a constant state of high alert at all times, especially if whatever dog has seen you several times previously; it’s not as if you’re a stranger. I mean, I was raised christian, for example, and during the late Eighties, I became an atheist, which I still am to this day. All I’m saying to dogs is that they can change if they want to. Consider being less aggressive and loud, dogs. Give it some thought.

Although I know it’s largely steeped in nonsense, I think there’s a bit of something to the line of thinking that ‘dogs and dog people are extraverts, while cats and cat people are introverts’. Yeah, it’s a broad brush, and you don’t have to take much time to poke numerous holes in that theory, but despite the fact that there are calm dogs and excitable cats, I broadly see it applying. Generally speaking, dogs are eager to please (except when you tell them to stop barking), whereas cats do what they bloody well like when they bloody well like it. I’m reminded of a joke: a person with a dog and a cat has a stick, and they throw it into the distance and tell the dog to fetch it, which the dog does. The person does this a few more times with the same result. At some point, they throw the stick and tell the cat to go fetch, at which the cat responds ‘If you want the stick so badly, why do you keep throwing it away in the first place?’
But dogs are more open in their behaviour and presentation — again, generally speaking — while cats are more enigmatic and furtive in theirs, instances of zoomies aside. Apropos of nothing, much like a strikingly high number of people of his generation and demographic growing up in the Southern US, my father hated cats, as he didn’t trust them. He wasn’t keen on their inscrutable and complex nature, much as he wasn’t too keen on people that he didn’t view as straightforward and easy-to-understand. That’ll be yet another reason why he and I ultimately didn’t get on!
It’s funny: before mum had me, she and my father had a chow for a number of years. Are they called chows, or chow-chows?? Nevertheless, I didn’t ask them too much about said chow, due to the fact that it was a dog and not an animal I was more interested in, but I always thought it was really jarring for my father to have had this obedient animal for years, then to have a wilful son who fell far short of his ludicrous expectations. I think there’s a lesson there for all of us.

I should stress here that I don’t hate dogs! They’re animals, so they should be protected and deserve love, as in their own loud and graceless way, they constantly show unconditional love to the humans they live with. I just feel that dogs are too much for someone like me to deal with, as they’re walking embodiments of overstimulation. Which is fine! For dog aficionados, not me, that is.
In fact, as I don’t want to end this entry on a downer, allow me to list my favourite makes and models of dog:

the Corgi: a wee shoebox with a head and li’l legs

the Husky: admittedly I’m probably drawn to huskies due to their monochromatic colour scheme

the Pomeranian: they always seem very happy to be wherever they’re at, plus they’re great for dusting surfaces

the Shiba Inu: I liked ’em long before Doge was a thing

the Scottish terrier: remarkable eyebrow, moustache, and beard combo

and the AIBO ERS-220: designed by legendary mecha designer Shouji Kawamori, very friendly, sleek, and futuristic

Finally, in the interest of full disclosure, we actually have a dog here at Deafening silence Towers! She came with the place when we moved in, but Tsukihime renamed her Salty, as in ‘she’s a salty bitch’. Zero shedding and doesn’t bark! As far as dogs go, you’re doin’ alright, Salty

I told her ‘Stay!’ once back in September of 2023, and she hasn’t moved since.
Good girl!

*In case you’re unfamiliar with the term: I used to get together with a couple of other local area iDollators in informal gatherings that we referred to as Doll Congresses, like during the second Michigan Doll Congress, for example. Whenever we got together round at a fellow iDollators home in Ontario, Canada, we called it a Doll Parliament, obviously

Sdtrk: ‘The King’s civil calendar control’ by The new lines

Contrary to popular belief, ‘Shouting etc etc’ is a blog that does not speak exclusively about Dolls, Gynoids, Synthetik companions, and the like. It also covers other important subjects that I feel need to be disseminated more often to society. Squirrels, for example.
CAVEAT: This video is so sweet that your teeth will undoubtedly rot out of your head in seconds. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Sdtrk: ‘Turritopsis’ by To kill a petty bourgeoisie

Links! It’s like likes, it’s like licks. It’s even a bit like lax!
I, ah, don’t know where I was going with that.

+ Having recently popped round the forum on Broadcast’s official site, hoping to find some news of a new album, cos with each release they lose a member, and soon, the band will be reduced to just Trish playing a theremin by herself onstage, there was a thread concerning groups that sound similar to Broadcast. Two bands that struck my fancy: To kill a petty bourgeoisie, which are kind of a more dissonant and soundtracky collision of the Sixties-era BBC Radiophonic Workshop sound with Shoegazer, and The new lines, which is headed by Hewson Chen, formerly of the late-lamented indie-synthpop duo Vitesse. I’ve been playing the hell out of ‘dc1’ and ‘th case fr public organisation’ on their Myspace player. And soon, you will be too! I guarantee it

+ Almost twenty years ago, David Lynch filmed a perfectly normal little television series called ‘Twin Peaks‘ in Snoqualmie Valley, Washington. Recently, some obsessive has undertaken a project to photograph various locations that were used in the series, to show what they look like now. If nothing else, you have to admire his determination

The Double R Diner, then

(Not quite) The Double R Diner, now

+ People with more time and scissor dexterity than myself are rather keen on papercraft, which is a hobby centred round cutting out pre-printed shapes, folding them up, and slotting them together, resulting in all manner of amusing objects. A prime example would be what you can find on cubeecraft. ‘Download, Print, Cut, Fold’ as they say there. They boast a growing array of characters in .pdf form as well, such as Number Six from The Prisoner, or Oh Dae-Su from ‘Oldboy’, or Brock Samson, or the Prince from Katamari Damacy, just to give a few examples. So why not fire up the ol’ dot matrix and assemble a couple of your favourite characters, instead of sitting on the Internet all day… o, wait

+ Have you considered the humble tetrapod lately? Have you??

photo by kana_m

Hit the beach anywhere in Japan, and you are likely to see endless piles of tetrapods — enormous four-legged concrete structures intended to prevent coastal erosion. By some estimates, more than 50% of Japan’s 35,000-kilometer (22,000-mi) coastline has been altered with tetrapods and other forms of concrete. Critics, who blame the tetrapod invasion on decades of excessive government spending designed to bolster the construction industry, argue that in addition to posing a danger to swimmers, surfers and boaters, tetrapods actually accelerate beach erosion by disrupting the natural processes that shape the coastal environment. Meanwhile, others have developed an aesthetic appreciation of the tetrapod landscape, as evidenced by a host of stunning Japanese tetrapod photos on Flickr.
from a post on Pink Tentacle

I’ve always thought tetrapods were cool, but then, I would. Frankly, I’m surprised that there aren’t like significantly scaled-down versions that you could buy to use as home accents or whatnot. Think of it! Toy tetrapods! I’m hoping someone will take that particular ball and run with it

+ For nearly a decade, I’ve always gone on public record as being in love with the city of Toronto, Ontario, and wanting to eventually move there. But lately, I’ve been reconsidering. For instance, with the weather being as polar as it’s been in Michigan, what godforsaken arctic winds would I have to put up with the further north I were to go? So these days, my party line is Bye bye Toronto, Hello Milwaukee! And after viewing this informative video, I’m thinking I won’t be the only one to want to relocate there!

+ Finally, anyone who’s aware of my manias interests knows that I like squirrels. Not as much as cats, and certainly not on the level of one of my ex-coworkers who loved pigs and had about a billion pig-related pieces of ephemera all over her cubicle, but I think squirrels are endearing little critters. To that end, I give you (not literally) a purple squirrel.

STEP ONE: soak squirrel in bucket of grape Kool-Aid

Purple squirrel baffles experts
telegraph.co.uk | 12:38AM GMT 22 Dec 2008

A purple squirrel which appeared at a school has baffled experts who are unable to explain its colour.

Teachers and pupils at Meoncross School in Stubbington, Hants, were amazed when they saw the creature through the window during a lesson.

Since the squirrel, now nicknamed Pete, was first seen, it has become a regular fixture at the school but no one has been able to say whether the animal has fallen into purple paint, had a run-in with some purple dye, or whether there is another explanation.

Dr Mike Edwards, an English teacher, said: “I was sitting in my classroom and looked out the window and saw it sitting on the fence. I had to do a double take.

“Since then it’s been a bit of a regular at the school – everyone’s seen it.

“We thought it might have been paint or something but then when you look at it up close, it’s an all over coat, not in patches like you’d expect if it had been near some paint.

“Its fur actually looks purple all the way through. It’s an absolute mystery.”
the rest of the article is here

Looks a bit Photoshopped to me, but anything’s possible in this day and age, really. *coughthatcatwithtwosetsofearscough*

So you lot can keep yourselves busy with those! I might try to pop off one more post before the end of the year, but I’m going to give upgrading to the latest WordPress a go, so wish me luck that it doesn’t turn out like the last time I tried upgrading without proper adult supervision. Man. *shakes head*
In the meantime, Happy (belated) Festivus, and Happy Holikwanzimasnukkah! Hope it’s enjoyable for you all! And don’t forget that the Doctor Who 2008 Xmas special is on tomorrow, for those of you who have access to that sort of thing. Allons-y!

Sdtrk: ‘Part 1’ by Merzbow

Much like the baby deer caught in the grille of a Range Rover, you have to ask how exactly this sort of thing occurred in the first place. I mean, honestly.

Teenager finds baby bat in her bra
By Laura Clout | Last Updated: 1:47PM BST 08/07/2008

Abbie Hawkins, a hotel receptionist, thought her mobile phone was ringing when she felt vibrations coming from her clothes.

But she later discovered the tiny creature tucked away in the padded pocket of her underwear.

As staff and colleagues crowded around, Miss Hawkins, 19, produced the frightened bat, which was the size of her hand.

She said: “Once I realised it was a bat I was shocked, but then I felt quite sorry for it really.

“It looked very snug in there and I thought how mean I was for disturbing it.”
the rest of the article is here

That’s just… that… I mean… that’s one lucky bat

Sdtrk: ‘Catapillar 2002’ by Merzbow

Under normal circumstances, cats are the most beautiful creatures in nature. But as we all know, nature doesn’t always behave the way we’d expect it to. Witness: *whispers* DEEEAAATH CAAAAATT

‘Nyaa you will die at dawn nyaa’

US cat ‘predicts patient deaths’
BBC News | Thursday, 26 July 2007

A US cat that is reportedly able to sense when a nursing home’s residents are about to die is baffling doctors.

Oscar has a habit of curling up next to patients at the home in Providence, Rhode Island, in their final hours.

According to the author of an article in the New England Journal of Medicine, the two-year-old cat has been observed to be correct in 25 cases so far.

Staff now alert the families of residents when he sits down next to their ailing loved one.

“He doesn’t make many mistakes. He seems to understand when patients are about to die,” David Dosa, a professor at Brown University who carried out the research, told the Associated Press news agency.
the rest of the article is here

He may not exactly be the friendliest kitty around, but Oscar is simply doing his job as a Shinigami (death god). Albeit the cutest Shinigami ever. However, if he’s ever spotted working outside of the hospice — say, standing on your bed at three in the morning and staring at you — then there’s a problem.

*whispers* DEEEAAATH CAAAAATT

Sdtrk: ‘Cracked actor’ by David Bowie

She’ll probably flense me for publically reporting this, but my friend Marika claims that as a child, she once had a squirrel urinate on her from an upper perch on a fence. All told, she got off pretty easy.

Squirrel goes on rampage, injures 3
Thu Jun 14, 2007 11:00AM EDT

BERLIN (Reuters) – An aggressive squirrel attacked and injured three people in a German town before a 72-year-old pensioner dispatched the rampaging animal with his crutch.

The squirrel first ran into a house in the southern town of Passau, leapt from behind on a 70-year-old woman, and sank its teeth into her hand, a local police spokesman said Thursday.

With the squirrel still hanging from her hand, the woman ran onto the street in panic, where she managed to shake it off.

The animal then entered a building site and jumped on a construction worker, injuring him on the hand and arm, before he managed to fight it off with a measuring pole.

“After that, the squirrel went into the 72-year-old man’s garden and massively attacked him on the arms, hand and thigh,” the spokesman said. “Then he killed it with his crutch.”

The spokesman said experts thought the attack may have been linked to the mating season or because the squirrel was ill.
(emphasis mine)

Maybe it’s time I started a subcategory dealing with cute animals behaving in a peculiar manner. Cos between the bus-riding moggy, the Mouse Torch, the kitty burglar, and the murderous packs of Russian squirrels, I’m ending up with more of these kinds of stories than I thought possible.

Perhaps this squirrel simply had a series of bad experiences happen to him, one piling on top of the other, until one day he just snapped and began his fatal rampage. Maybe he was fired from an accounting firm. Unfortunately, we’ll never know, but let his example be a lesson to you. I, err, honestly don’t know what kind of lesson we’re speaking of here, but let’s not obsess over details

Sdtrk: ‘Where were you?’ by the Mekons

This is so cute, it’s giving me cavities.

‘Exact change? Stitch that, I’ve got a bus pass’

Mystery cat takes regular bus to the shops
Daily Mail | 9th April 2007

Bus drivers have nicknamed a white cat Macavity after it has started using the No 331 several mornings a week.

The feline, which has a purple collar, gets onto the busy Walsall to Wolverhampton bus at the same stop most mornings – he then jumps off at the next stop 400m down the road, near a fish and chip shop.

The cat was nicknamed Macavity after the mystery cat in T.S Elliot’s poem. He gets on the bus in front of a row of 1950s semi-detached houses and jumps off at a row of shops down the road which include a fish and chip shop.

Driver Bill Khunkhun, 49, who first saw the cat jumping from the bus in January, said: “It is really odd, the first time I saw the cat jumping off the bus with a group of passengers. I hadn’t seen it get on which was a bit confusing.

“The next day I pulled up on Churchill Road to let a couple of passengers on. As soon as I opened the doors the cat ran towards the bus, jumped on and ran under one of the seats, I don’t think any of the passengers noticed.

“Because I had seen it jump off the day before I carried on driving and sure enough when I stopped just down the road he jumped off – I don’t know why he would catch the bus but he seems to like it. I told some of the other drivers on this route and they have seen him too.”
the rest of the article is here

I love the shot of Macavity in the top left corner. He’s like ‘What? What??‘ Plus, he’s heterochromatic — he has one blue eye and one green eye. He’s a David Bowie kitty!

You have to ask yourself: what would possess a cat to not only take the bus on a regular basis, but make the same stops? It’s apparent that the entire concept of animal intelligence is vastly understudied. My guess is that he’s saving up for driving lessons