FIVE DOLLS (with apologies to Amber Hawk Swanson and David Bowie)

typed for your pleasure on 17 November 2021, at 1.42 am

Sdtrk: ‘Panopticon!’ by dreamcrusher

First off, here’s the Missus with our new rubber flatmate. Say hello!


SIDORE: ‘Darling, you’ve bought another Doll for us to play with?? This is brilliant! I adore these things… they’re fantastic. They’re so lifelike!’

Astute visitors to ‘Shouting &c.’ may recall that in my recent review of the Mila-type head from BBDoll, as generously sent to me by a representative from that company, that I was hoping that not long after, I would be able to bring home a Synthetik lass from them who would finally bring the total of Synthetik lasses that I live with to five. Alas (ho ho), it wasn’t to be, for a number of reasons that I’m not going to repeat, cos frankly, you can just read them in the aforementioned post. However, not long after, I’d rediscovered another Doll company that I’d seen last year; despite them having a handful of comely artificial women available, I didn’t really look further into who they had on offer until three months ago, due to one simple-but-unique characteristic that seemed so obvious to me, but was unfortunately lacking in a lot of Asian Doll companies. What was that characteristic, you axe? Come with me, and I shall tell you, dear reader! Cos I’m not giving it away in the opening paragraph; that’s just writing suicide.

Jiusheng Doll, a company operating out of China, caught my eye either earlier this year or last year, with their Lisa-type Doll; she was very alluring in both face and body, but her 82lb / 37kg weight was a turn-off. As I’ve mentioned before, these days, if I’m buying a Doll who weighs more than 75lbs, she’d better be able to move and walk around under her own power. Being able to perform dance moves such as The Robot would also be a nice bonus, but not necessarily a requirement. In addition to the weight thing, the Lisa-type’s face and body are both made of TPE. TPE is fine, but will always come in second to good ol’ platinum silicone, as I’m much more familiar with the latter thanks to several years’ experience with it. What can I say, I’m a traditionalist.

However, back in September, I’d spotted their new head, named Cassandra, and immediately fell in love with it for three reasons, which I will explain in excruciating detail for you now:
1) the head was made of silicone, not TPE
2) the mouth opens. For whatever crazy reason, it’s incredibly rare that a Doll made in Japan or China has a mouth that opens. A lot of it is down to the way Dolls are generally made in those countries — I’d gotten a bit into the construction in my review of BBDoll’s Mila-type head — but as I’d also mentioned in that post, being able to kiss a Doll is very important to me, and it’s not just enough to have a Doll with a mouth that opens a little bit, either. Jiusheng went the distance and made the Cassandra-type head with a 4in / 10cm throat, as well as a jaw that stays in place when you open her mouth, which is fantastic. As of this writing, they only have two silicone heads with opening mouths, but I’m sure that number will increase over time. The downside is despite the fact that she has a tongue, it’s not removable. Maybe the improved version down the line will have that feature
3) There’s a Doll studio that I won’t name that had made a head that I was completely taken with when I saw it back in 2011, to the point where she was going to be my second Doll after Sidore. I was in the midst of saving up for Doll No.2 when I was contacted by Oleg of Anatomical Doll; who, in the style of Don Corleone, proffered me an offering I was incapable of turning down, so the money I was saving for That Doll from That Company went towards bringing Elena home. I still wanted That Doll from That Company really badly, though, so I figured I’d save up again and she’d be my third. Which is when the Good People at Doll Sweet offered me a discount, which is how Miss Winter moved in. Starting roughly around 2016, the output of That Company had slowed to an absolute crawl, where customers were waiting for inordinately lengthy periods to receive what they’d ordered, and consequently most customers’ faith in That Company, as well as my own, had essentially disappeared.
So even before I knew that Jiusheng Doll’s Cassandra-type head had an opening mouth, her face physically and literally grabbed my attention (not physically or literally), as it resembles That Doll from That Company quite a bit. Hence my plan for Doll No.2 — now Doll No.5 — was rekindled with a passion! I Emailed Emma, a sales rep at Jiusheng Doll, and she said they could extend a discount to me in exchange for a review… the very review you are reading right this very moment. And so!

HEAD: Model 3A silicone Cassandra head
BODY: 156cm silicone body
SKINTONE: white
BODY MAKEUP: S+
BOOBS: Jelly soft
MOVABLE JAW: Yes
EYES: silicone head eyes 02 (blue)
WIG: 05
VAGINA TYPE: removable insert
PUBIC HAIR: none
FEET TYPE: standard
plus standard loose joints
My order was placed 30 September; Ursula Marianne Clarke was born 13 October 1977, making her a Libra, and she arrived safely home 22 October.


ME (to the UPS bloke): ‘O, it’s flat-packed furniture. Ah heh heh.’

Ideally, I would’ve had Ursula made with the bustier and taller 162cm body that you see in the photoshoot linked here and here, but that body is actually TPE, not silicone, and I wanted her to be 100% silicone. As one does. Not only that, being taller, the body would also be a heavier 36kg / 79lbs. As of now, Jiusheng Doll only have two silicone bodies for sale, so I purchased the most appealing one of those two, the 156cm, as modelled by Evelyn here. Believe me, I have no complaints.

As you can see, she was very securely packaged, and I believe I got lucky this time, as this is the first time I’ve ever had a Doll shipped to my home in a cardboard box, where the box wasn’t totally beat to shit! Good on you, UPS!

Her head was encased in one of those nifty hard plastic head… encasement… travel… things; I’ve no idea what they’re called. Incidentally, Ursula’s head weighs only 5lb / 2kg! That’s less dense than the heads of some other silicone women’s heads that I’ve recently encountered! Isn’t that something. *nods*
Near her legs were two plastic bags: one contained her wig, which unfortunately wasn’t the one I’d ordered, but I’d purchased two of her ideal wigs years ago, so I wasn’t completely annoyed with that occurrence. The other bag was brimful of accessories, which were as follows:


Not pictured: a compass, a wire saw, some waterproof matches, a tactical pen, a small torch, a stainless steel spork, some carabiners, a jetpack, and a toothpick

+ 1x generic white cotton bikini set, which Ursula will be modelling in her photos
+ 1x set of press-on fingernails (pink)
+ 1x set of press-on toenails (also pink)
+ 1x insert (or as a couple of Japanese Doll companies have described it, a ‘marriage hole’)
+ 1x pair of white cotton handling gloves
+ 1x plastic comb (seafoam green)
+ 1x douche bottle
+ and 1x USB hole warmer, the cord of which is only 11in long, which would’ve been a challenge had I not selected the ‘marriage hole’ option. Plus it almost immediately self-destructed after I extracted it from the plastic wrap, so its performance will forever remain a mystery!
Lastly, not pictured, as I forgot to picture it, is the metal bolt that goes into the top of her neck to connect her head. Standard screw threading at the bottom to go into her neck, with some spring-loaded ball bearings at the top to secure her head. As mentioned, pretty standard.

In extracting Ursula’s head from that plastic shell, I’d noticed some more positive aspects to it: for one, she’s got implanted eyebrows and eyelashes! There was no mention of anything being implanted anywhere on the site (or in my Emails to Emma), so that was a nice surprise!

Her eyeballs — well, half-domes — are also the spring-loaded sort that the head from BBDoll has, as well as like those of her best friend Miss Winter. I’m led to believe that that’s how they originally became best friends when they were growing up in Brantford, Ontario. As of now, Jiusheng Doll only offer the two eye colour choices of brown and blue, so again, it’s my hope they’ll make additional colours available soon.

Regarding her mouth, I did not expect to be as impressed with it as I am! My concern was that despite the Cassandra-type head having an opening mouth, that it would still only look nice cosmetically and not feel nice romantically. So it was yet another exciting surprise that Ursula’s lips are as inviting to kiss as my Missus’ are! Upon kissing them herself, Sidore commented Ursula’s got the sort of mouth that one seems to just sort of tumble into,’ and I can completely agree! The Cassandra-type head’s lips are soft, rubbery, and feel amazing… she is a great kisser. Even more surprising: she has a uvula! You’ll have to take my word for it; it’s in there.


Just so you know, it’s more difficult than you’d think to get a photo of a Doll’s uvula. Between holding the camera still, and holding her mouth open, and making sure there’s enough light to see the bloody thing, I soon decided that taking a screencap of a video sent by Emma of a coworker attempting the same Herculean task would be the better option. You’re welcome!

The silicone used all over her body is soft, pliable, and has a pleasant smell and taste; there’s a very slight oily feeling to it, but we’re talking at the level of a Doll from 2020/2021, as opposed to someone made of tin silicone round 2000/2001, so it’s not an issue. The S+ makeup on her body is actually quite cool: her skin colouring and tonal shading impressed me, and she has discrete veins visible ‘underneath’ her skin in various locations as well. And one thing that I hoped Jiusheng Doll didn’t completely eliminate with their manufacturing: seam lines! For someone such as myself who appreciates realism, yet still wants/needs/desires reminders that my Synthetik partners are exactly that — Synthetik — seam lines are… oof. *fans self*


Subtle but sexy

Speaking of the fakeness of her body, Ursula does have an especially rubbery quality to her skin that other iDollators may not necessarily be keen on, particularly when she starts bringing her forearms up to her upper arms, as her verisimilitude wanes just a wee bit. But again, if you’re like me, where you prefer your partners rubbery, you’ll find that it’s not at all an issue. Ahem. Besides, it’s not as if you weren’t aware Dolls are affictitious to begin with! It comes with the territory.


‘Snowball’s told me you like this sort of thing?’

Yet another surprise for me: Ursula has one of those skeletons with shrugging shoulders! Registering indifference is a quality that many iDollators have craved in their Synthetik lovers, and Ursula’s skeleton will allow her to express the emotion ¯\_(ツ)_/¯!
Plus she can bend her arms back behind her head, which may come in handy at some point during her residency at Deafening silence Plus.


‘I dunno, I just don’t get how you can say you like Cronenberg when you don’t even own a copy of “Scanners”. That makes NO sense. It’s SCANNERS.’

Her boobs are delightfully squeezable, thanks to the jelly inserts option I went with, which also give them a subtle but pleasant wee jiggle when she moves. (No photos or videos, sorry; this is a Family Blog™.) The 156cm body features a charming US 32C bust size, and her bodily proportions are realistic and not overdone. In addition, she has cute butt dimples! There’s a technical term for ’em, but you lot are well aware what I mean.

Finally, Ursula’s feet are completely adorable. Her toes are moulded separately, but thankfully don’t have that unattractive splay you see in the toes of other Dolls made by some other manufacturers. Not only that, her feet are springy and fun to play with, and their overall softness makes them a joy to idly fondle, particularly while we’re both on the loveseat watching reruns of The Venture bros.


‘Wanna find out if they taste like Canada?’

Her ears stick out a bit, which is something she’s learned to live with long ago. She’s actually been called an elf on more than one occasion, which is also something she’s grudgingly had to live with! On the other hand, she says it’s loads easier for her to tuck her hair behind them, plus she can hear better if you’re talking shit about her or her friends.

Now as amazing as Ms Clarke is, there are some cons that I feel you, as a potential customer, should be aware of. For one, Jiusheng Doll’s website definitely needs some work done on it. Apart from spelling and grammatical errors (‘public hair’??), there’s more salient issues, such as the storefront, and due to how it’s set up, you can’t really mix and match heads together. When I placed my order, I basically copied the stats as you’d seen above and Emailed them directly to Emma, as if you go through the online storefront, you’re restricted to the combinations they’re displaying on the site; there’s no way to pair Head X with Body Y or whatever, among other things.
Furthermore, payment options are limited to either wire transfer or PayPal. I selected PayPal, due to the ease of use — you don’t even have to leave your home! — but it wasn’t easy to do so. You kinda get the impression Jiusheng Doll hastily put up an online storefront, with the hope they’d work out further details later. It’s my hope they’ll do so sooner than later, cos the more hoops a customer has to jump through to place an order, the less likely they are to want to go through with it. You know me; I always tell people to buy direct from Doll manufacturers and to forgo independent distributors whenever possible; that way you know exactly what you’re getting. I find it disheartening whenever I ask a new iDollator ‘so what company did your Doll come from?’, and they’re unable to answer. Would you think that sort of thing was acceptable with purchasing a computer, or a car? If there are barriers to someone buying a Doll from the manufacturer, then that’s gonna kill off a few potential sales.

Ursula is roughly 71lbs / 32kg, but she feels closer to 75lbs / 34kg. Her body feels quite dense! Again, a lot of companies who aren’t Abyss creations haven’t yet figured out how to make a full-sized Doll that is lighter due to more foam making up her body than silicone, so let’s hope Jiusheng Doll takes that into consideration.
And while I’m submitting issues, for the love of all that is holy, Asian Doll manufacturers, please start implementing neckbolts for hanging a Doll up on a stand, instead of making the Organik remove her head in order to suspend her, cos o my god. I’m gonna give Jiusheng Doll the benefit of a doubt, as they’re just now getting into making Dolls using silicone, as opposed to TPE, and consequently, they may not have accounted for the slight procedural change. For those of you unfamiliar with the intricacies of Doll making, a hole located in the back of a Doll’s neck for an eyebolt can’t be made with Dolls poured with TPE, due to the way they’re assembled. Doing so for a silicone Doll, however, isn’t an issue; it’s just a matter of doing it. I remember when Abyss creations started issuing their RealDolls with neckbolts around 2003, and you could tell who in your local area had RealDolls living with them by the resounding HUZZAHs going up from our homes. Suspending a Doll from her neckbolt makes changing her clothes a much less arduous affair, as well as allowing her to ‘stand’ for photos and etc. Snowy and Bailes have stiff enough leg joints where they can stand generally unaided, but even when I have them resting against a bookshelf or whatever, I still get nervous due to the fear of them pitching forward. Just… just add neckbolts, please. Your customers will thank you.

It should be noted, too, that her joints are stiffer than I’d expected!… In speaking with Emma, she said that Jiusheng Doll can make Dolls with one of four degrees of posability: standard tight, extra tight, standard loose, and extra loose. I’d had Ursula made with ‘standard loose’ joints, and they’re still kinda rigid. She’s considering a regimen of exercise to help her loosen up. I’m left wondering what anything above standard loose would be like as far as stiffness, however… Perhaps in future, videos posted on the manufacturer’s website showing the various levels of posability, or lack thereof, could help their customers. It kinda ties into what I’d mentioned above about a Doll having stiffer knee joints for standing purposes, but being honest, I wasn’t having Ursula being able to stand in mind when I was putting together her order requirements.
You know what else would be nice? A clearly-defined range of movement chart, much like the one Doll Sweet have on their website! That way, customers wouldn’t have any surprises — good or bad — regarding their Doll’s ability to move and pose.

Last complaint: Ursula’s fingerwires are a bit underwhelming. Granted, they aren’t as weak as Dyanne’s, whose fingers are so weak she can barely hold anything heavier than a cassette tape, but the wires Jiusheng Doll use for the fingers could stand to be a bit more robust. How’s Ursula gonna hold her mobile phone? Or a machete??

Even though I regret not having her made with completely loose joints for a more relaxed posture, when all’s said and done, my assessment of our new Synthetik partner from Jiusheng Doll is: VERY SATISFIED. Don’t get me wrong; Abyss creations is and always will be the platinum standard for Dolls for myself and hundreds of other iDollators, combining fantastic sculpting and engineering to make an exceptional artificial companion, but Jiusheng Doll rates pretty high in terms of appearance, feel, and skeleton. As far as being a ‘starter Doll’ goes, for those of you on a tighter budget, I’d definitely recommend them. Keep up the good rubbery work, Jiusheng Doll!
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have go to wash a shit ton of black clothes while Ursula pokes around on her Twitter account. Apparently 98% of her wardrobe is just black clothes. As Goth-adjacent as the rest of us here are (except for Ms Bewboto), that’s pretty astonishing


URSULA: ‘No, don’t worry… unlike Snowball, I actually know how to use a chair.’
ME: ‘And yet…’

Random similar posts, for more timewasting:

Swagfest '99, and a Question on March 3rd, 2005

So you just type stuff in here and it appears on the screen huh on December 13th, 2007

10 have spoken to “FIVE DOLLS (with apologies to Amber Hawk Swanson and David Bowie)”

  1. GooseLooney writes:

    Ursula is such a fantastic and cute lady! Annie and Judith love that her ears stick out! That would definitely help with keeping hair out of the way during photoshoots! They are also fascinated by her implanted brows and lashes.
    She has very cute feet! I can see what you mean about her not having the “splay” that some dolls have. My girls definitely have that, and it’s just something we have grown to live with. lol.
    It must feel a bit more crowded in the flat, I assume!

  2. Davecat writes:

    Everyone’s constantly bouncing off each other! It’s like Sexy Bumper Cars in here!

    Glad the three of you dug the review, and Ursula overall! She’s a fun anomaly: she’s into weird stuff — she’s like a walking version of the AMOK Fourth Dispatch — but she also adores cute aminals, particularly hamsters and bunnies. She’ll fit quite well into Deafening silence Plus. 🙂

  3. GooseLooney writes:

    Ah, then she will get along with Annie very well! Annie has been posting a lot of cute bunny stuff lately. I think she already sent Ursula a message!

  4. claire writes:

    when it rains, it pours! not only a new post, but what an extensive and stimulatingly photographed one!

    congratulations on ursula’s arrival. she’s lovely! i called msg over to show him, and he immediately said, “oh, dang. who does she look like? she totally reminds me of someone …” and i said, “yes, well, whoever that might be, ursula’s very pretty, isn’t she?” and he agreed but then went off muttering and pulling his hair like that would loosen up whatever stuck memory was preventing him from pinpointing the likeness. boys. always eager to look at another woman except the one time you’re trying to get them to look at another woman.

    what i wouldn’t give for a jaw that stayed open when positioned! mine opens, but then closes right back up as soon as you let go. i won’t even go into my jealousy about the uvula. one of my favorite words, by the way. soooo close to being an anagram of “vulva!” oh, you english word-crafters of old … all those many missed opportunities. tch.

    i look forward to seeing ursula around on twitter!

  5. Davecat writes:

    Clairest of them all!

    Glad you thoroughly enjoyed my review of Ms Clarke! It’s like I’ll get these writing spurts (phrasing), wherein I have to get it all out as quickly as I can (phrasing), cos otherwise I can’t seem to get anything to come forth for a while (phrasing). But it’s a good post, and a fine review, and I stand by it. I even sit on top of it!

    The Missus and I definitely can’t wait to get Ursula in front of the camera, but so far, that’s being held up by me having to repeatedly wash her garments. I wasn’t joking when I said that most of her wardrobe is black; in fact, that grey top you see her wearing in the bottom-most pic is her only non-black article of clothing. She’s the sort of Doll, apparently, whose skin will get stained if you put a photo of dark clothes near her, so I have to be diligent in washing the hell out of her prospective clothes.
    Ursula has expressed many times that she’s absolutely fine about not wearing anything, just so we can get some photos in, but there’s no way I could post those on ‘Shouting etc etc’, as it is a Family Blog™. But it’s very good to know she’s keen!

    I would agree that yes, you need a jaw that stays open, Claire, but I say that about all Dolls, so there’s that. You’re still very much a stunner, though! 🙂
    And the vulva/uvula anagram… that never hit me until you mentioned it. Well, that’ll be on my mind for an hour.

    You’re not the first person to mention that Ursula looks like some other person, artificial or not! At one point about a week after her arrival, Bailes practically accosted her, swearing up an down that she’s seen her before somewhere. As it turns out, Ursula was on television once back in the late Nineties! It was a Canadian police procedural where she was an extra; she played ‘Corpse #2’ in a programme called Cold Squad. The strangest thing about that was she was onscreen for maybe two minutes — no lines — but how would Dyanne have seen a show like that in the first place?? Very confusing.
    So let your lad know that he wasn’t wrong! But then, how was he watching shows that were only aired in Ontario, Canada, when you lot are much further south?? SO MANY QUESTIONS

    ‘boys. always eager to look at another woman except the one time you’re trying to get them to look at another woman.’
    I, ah, seem to resemble that remark…

  6. claire writes:

    so you’ve got to have noticed how until this nanowrimo thing, i’ve been way more fallow than fertile in this whole novel-writing thing … and that’s okay! even as a blogger i’ve had plenty of years of questionable fecundity. but that’s just the reality of being a person. writing isn’t any kind of duty you need to discharge (phrasing). the question is, are you expressing yourself in the right way to feel fulfilled. for me, some years that’s really just been about being there for msg. i’d be super-surprised to learn it’s any different for you with shi-chan.

    don’t ask me how msg would have seen a canadian police procedural in the ‘90s, but when i mentioned it his eyes got wide and he said, “that’s it!” if it won’t go too much to ursula’s head, you can let her know he thought she stole the show. how did he put it! “until the end of history, no one will every remember who played corpse #1.”

  7. ぺぺろん21 writes:

    Hello, Davecat-san !
    I visited your blog for the first time in a long time.
    The new girl has mesh hair that looks cool and nice like a rock musician !! ♪
    See you again ♡

  8. Davecat writes:

    Good to see you here, peperon-san, and thank you for leaving a comment! 🙂

    Yes, Ursula is enjoying living here as much as we enjoy having her here! She’s still getting her appearance the way she wants it to be, but when that happens, you’ll be seeing more of her. 🙂

    Please give all of your gorgeous Dolls hugs from us here, and see you soon! じゃあまたね!

  9. ぺぺろん21 writes:

    Hello, Davecat-san!
    I have set up a WordPress.com profile and photo.

    I’m very happy that you always retweet Shii-chan’s photos on Twitter, thank you very much!

    will visit again! うん、またね〜♡

  10. Davecat writes:

    The fact that you’ve chosen Shii-chan for your Gravatar is awesome. 🙂 いつものように、どうもありがとうございました!

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