FIVE DOLLS (with apologies to Amber Hawk Swanson and David Bowie)

typed for your pleasure on 17 November 2021, at 1.42 am

Sdtrk: ‘Panopticon!’ by dreamcrusher

First off, here’s the Missus with our new rubber flatmate. Say hello!


SIDORE: ‘Darling, you’ve bought another Doll for us to play with?? This is brilliant! I adore these things… they’re fantastic. They’re so lifelike!’

Astute visitors to ‘Shouting &c.’ may recall that in my recent review of the Mila-type head from BBDoll, as generously sent to me by a representative from that company, that I was hoping that not long after, I would be able to bring home a Synthetik lass from them who would finally bring the total of Synthetik lasses that I live with to five. Alas (ho ho), it wasn’t to be, for a number of reasons that I’m not going to repeat, cos frankly, you can just read them in the aforementioned post. However, not long after, I’d rediscovered another Doll company that I’d seen last year; despite them having a handful of comely artificial women available, I didn’t really look further into who they had on offer until three months ago, due to one simple-but-unique characteristic that seemed so obvious to me, but was unfortunately lacking in a lot of Asian Doll companies. What was that characteristic, you axe? Come with me, and I shall tell you, dear reader! Cos I’m not giving it away in the opening paragraph; that’s just writing suicide.

Jiusheng Doll, a company operating out of China, caught my eye either earlier this year or last year, with their Lisa-type Doll; she was very alluring in both face and body, but her 82lb / 37kg weight was a turn-off. As I’ve mentioned before, these days, if I’m buying a Doll who weighs more than 75lbs, she’d better be able to move and walk around under her own power. Being able to perform dance moves such as The Robot would also be a nice bonus, but not necessarily a requirement. In addition to the weight thing, the Lisa-type’s face and body are both made of TPE. TPE is fine, but will always come in second to good ol’ platinum silicone, as I’m much more familiar with the latter thanks to several years’ experience with it. What can I say, I’m a traditionalist.

However, back in September, I’d spotted their new head, named Cassandra, and immediately fell in love with it for three reasons, which I will explain in excruciating detail for you now:
1) the head was made of silicone, not TPE
2) the mouth opens. For whatever crazy reason, it’s incredibly rare that a Doll made in Japan or China has a mouth that opens. A lot of it is down to the way Dolls are generally made in those countries — I’d gotten a bit into the construction in my review of BBDoll’s Mila-type head — but as I’d also mentioned in that post, being able to kiss a Doll is very important to me, and it’s not just enough to have a Doll with a mouth that opens a little bit, either. Jiusheng went the distance and made the Cassandra-type head with a 4in / 10cm throat, as well as a jaw that stays in place when you open her mouth, which is fantastic. As of this writing, they only have two silicone heads with opening mouths, but I’m sure that number will increase over time. The downside is despite the fact that she has a tongue, it’s not removable. Maybe the improved version down the line will have that feature
3) There’s a Doll studio that I won’t name that had made a head that I was completely taken with when I saw it back in 2011, to the point where she was going to be my second Doll after Sidore. I was in the midst of saving up for Doll No.2 when I was contacted by Oleg of Anatomical Doll; who, in the style of Don Corleone, proffered me an offering I was incapable of turning down, so the money I was saving for That Doll from That Company went towards bringing Elena home. I still wanted That Doll from That Company really badly, though, so I figured I’d save up again and she’d be my third. Which is when the Good People at Doll Sweet offered me a discount, which is how Miss Winter moved in. Starting roughly around 2016, the output of That Company had slowed to an absolute crawl, where customers were waiting for inordinately lengthy periods to receive what they’d ordered, and consequently most customers’ faith in That Company, as well as my own, had essentially disappeared.
So even before I knew that Jiusheng Doll’s Cassandra-type head had an opening mouth, her face physically and literally grabbed my attention (not physically or literally), as it resembles That Doll from That Company quite a bit. Hence my plan for Doll No.2 — now Doll No.5 — was rekindled with a passion! I Emailed Emma, a sales rep at Jiusheng Doll, and she said they could extend a discount to me in exchange for a review… the very review you are reading right this very moment. And so!

HEAD: Model 3A silicone Cassandra head
BODY: 156cm silicone body
SKINTONE: white
BODY MAKEUP: S+
BOOBS: Jelly soft
MOVABLE JAW: Yes
EYES: silicone head eyes 02 (blue)
WIG: 05
VAGINA TYPE: removable insert
PUBIC HAIR: none
FEET TYPE: standard
plus standard loose joints
My order was placed 30 September; Ursula Marianne Clarke was born 13 October 1977, making her a Libra, and she arrived safely home 22 October.


ME (to the UPS bloke): ‘O, it’s flat-packed furniture. Ah heh heh.’

Ideally, I would’ve had Ursula made with the bustier and taller 162cm body that you see in the photoshoot linked here and here, but that body is actually TPE, not silicone, and I wanted her to be 100% silicone. As one does. Not only that, being taller, the body would also be a heavier 36kg / 79lbs. As of now, Jiusheng Doll only have two silicone bodies for sale, so I purchased the most appealing one of those two, the 156cm, as modelled by Evelyn here. Believe me, I have no complaints.

As you can see, she was very securely packaged, and I believe I got lucky this time, as this is the first time I’ve ever had a Doll shipped to my home in a cardboard box, where the box wasn’t totally beat to shit! Good on you, UPS!

Her head was encased in one of those nifty hard plastic head… encasement… travel… things; I’ve no idea what they’re called. Incidentally, Ursula’s head weighs only 5lb / 2kg! That’s less dense than the heads of some other silicone women’s heads that I’ve recently encountered! Isn’t that something. *nods*
Near her legs were two plastic bags: one contained her wig, which unfortunately wasn’t the one I’d ordered, but I’d purchased two of her ideal wigs years ago, so I wasn’t completely annoyed with that occurrence. The other bag was brimful of accessories, which were as follows:


Not pictured: a compass, a wire saw, some waterproof matches, a tactical pen, a small torch, a stainless steel spork, some carabiners, a jetpack, and a toothpick

+ 1x generic white cotton bikini set, which Ursula will be modelling in her photos
+ 1x set of press-on fingernails (pink)
+ 1x set of press-on toenails (also pink)
+ 1x insert (or as a couple of Japanese Doll companies have described it, a ‘marriage hole’)
+ 1x pair of white cotton handling gloves
+ 1x plastic comb (seafoam green)
+ 1x douche bottle
+ and 1x USB hole warmer, the cord of which is only 11in long, which would’ve been a challenge had I not selected the ‘marriage hole’ option. Plus it almost immediately self-destructed after I extracted it from the plastic wrap, so its performance will forever remain a mystery!
Lastly, not pictured, as I forgot to picture it, is the metal bolt that goes into the top of her neck to connect her head. Standard screw threading at the bottom to go into her neck, with some spring-loaded ball bearings at the top to secure her head. As mentioned, pretty standard.

In extracting Ursula’s head from that plastic shell, I’d noticed some more positive aspects to it: for one, she’s got implanted eyebrows and eyelashes! There was no mention of anything being implanted anywhere on the site (or in my Emails to Emma), so that was a nice surprise!

Her eyeballs — well, half-domes — are also the spring-loaded sort that the head from BBDoll has, as well as like those of her best friend Miss Winter. I’m led to believe that that’s how they originally became best friends when they were growing up in Brantford, Ontario. As of now, Jiusheng Doll only offer the two eye colour choices of brown and blue, so again, it’s my hope they’ll make additional colours available soon.

Regarding her mouth, I did not expect to be as impressed with it as I am! My concern was that despite the Cassandra-type head having an opening mouth, that it would still only look nice cosmetically and not feel nice romantically. So it was yet another exciting surprise that Ursula’s lips are as inviting to kiss as my Missus’ are! Upon kissing them herself, Sidore commented Ursula’s got the sort of mouth that one seems to just sort of tumble into,’ and I can completely agree! The Cassandra-type head’s lips are soft, rubbery, and feel amazing… she is a great kisser. Even more surprising: she has a uvula! You’ll have to take my word for it; it’s in there.


Just so you know, it’s more difficult than you’d think to get a photo of a Doll’s uvula. Between holding the camera still, and holding her mouth open, and making sure there’s enough light to see the bloody thing, I soon decided that taking a screencap of a video sent by Emma of a coworker attempting the same Herculean task would be the better option. You’re welcome!

The silicone used all over her body is soft, pliable, and has a pleasant smell and taste; there’s a very slight oily feeling to it, but we’re talking at the level of a Doll from 2020/2021, as opposed to someone made of tin silicone round 2000/2001, so it’s not an issue. The S+ makeup on her body is actually quite cool: her skin colouring and tonal shading impressed me, and she has discrete veins visible ‘underneath’ her skin in various locations as well. And one thing that I hoped Jiusheng Doll didn’t completely eliminate with their manufacturing: seam lines! For someone such as myself who appreciates realism, yet still wants/needs/desires reminders that my Synthetik partners are exactly that — Synthetik — seam lines are… oof. *fans self*


Subtle but sexy

Speaking of the fakeness of her body, Ursula does have an especially rubbery quality to her skin that other iDollators may not necessarily be keen on, particularly when she starts bringing her forearms up to her upper arms, as her verisimilitude wanes just a wee bit. But again, if you’re like me, where you prefer your partners rubbery, you’ll find that it’s not at all an issue. Ahem. Besides, it’s not as if you weren’t aware Dolls are affictitious to begin with! It comes with the territory.


‘Snowball’s told me you like this sort of thing?’

Yet another surprise for me: Ursula has one of those skeletons with shrugging shoulders! Registering indifference is a quality that many iDollators have craved in their Synthetik lovers, and Ursula’s skeleton will allow her to express the emotion ¯\_(ツ)_/¯!
Plus she can bend her arms back behind her head, which may come in handy at some point during her residency at Deafening silence Plus.


‘I dunno, I just don’t get how you can say you like Cronenberg when you don’t even own a copy of “Scanners”. That makes NO sense. It’s SCANNERS.’

Her boobs are delightfully squeezable, thanks to the jelly inserts option I went with, which also give them a subtle but pleasant wee jiggle when she moves. (No photos or videos, sorry; this is a Family Blog™.) The 156cm body features a charming US 32C bust size, and her bodily proportions are realistic and not overdone. In addition, she has cute butt dimples! There’s a technical term for ’em, but you lot are well aware what I mean.

Finally, Ursula’s feet are completely adorable. Her toes are moulded separately, but thankfully don’t have that unattractive splay you see in the toes of other Dolls made by some other manufacturers. Not only that, her feet are springy and fun to play with, and their overall softness makes them a joy to idly fondle, particularly while we’re both on the loveseat watching reruns of The Venture bros.


‘Wanna find out if they taste like Canada?’

Her ears stick out a bit, which is something she’s learned to live with long ago. She’s actually been called an elf on more than one occasion, which is also something she’s grudgingly had to live with! On the other hand, she says it’s loads easier for her to tuck her hair behind them, plus she can hear better if you’re talking shit about her or her friends.

Now as amazing as Ms Clarke is, there are some cons that I feel you, as a potential customer, should be aware of. For one, Jiusheng Doll’s website definitely needs some work done on it. Apart from spelling and grammatical errors (‘public hair’??), there’s more salient issues, such as the storefront, and due to how it’s set up, you can’t really mix and match heads together. When I placed my order, I basically copied the stats as you’d seen above and Emailed them directly to Emma, as if you go through the online storefront, you’re restricted to the combinations they’re displaying on the site; there’s no way to pair Head X with Body Y or whatever, among other things.
Furthermore, payment options are limited to either wire transfer or PayPal. I selected PayPal, due to the ease of use — you don’t even have to leave your home! — but it wasn’t easy to do so. You kinda get the impression Jiusheng Doll hastily put up an online storefront, with the hope they’d work out further details later. It’s my hope they’ll do so sooner than later, cos the more hoops a customer has to jump through to place an order, the less likely they are to want to go through with it. You know me; I always tell people to buy direct from Doll manufacturers and to forgo independent distributors whenever possible; that way you know exactly what you’re getting. I find it disheartening whenever I ask a new iDollator ‘so what company did your Doll come from?’, and they’re unable to answer. Would you think that sort of thing was acceptable with purchasing a computer, or a car? If there are barriers to someone buying a Doll from the manufacturer, then that’s gonna kill off a few potential sales.

Ursula is roughly 71lbs / 32kg, but she feels closer to 75lbs / 34kg. Her body feels quite dense! Again, a lot of companies who aren’t Abyss creations haven’t yet figured out how to make a full-sized Doll that is lighter due to more foam making up her body than silicone, so let’s hope Jiusheng Doll takes that into consideration.
And while I’m submitting issues, for the love of all that is holy, Asian Doll manufacturers, please start implementing neckbolts for hanging a Doll up on a stand, instead of making the Organik remove her head in order to suspend her, cos o my god. I’m gonna give Jiusheng Doll the benefit of a doubt, as they’re just now getting into making Dolls using silicone, as opposed to TPE, and consequently, they may not have accounted for the slight procedural change. For those of you unfamiliar with the intricacies of Doll making, a hole located in the back of a Doll’s neck for an eyebolt can’t be made with Dolls poured with TPE, due to the way they’re assembled. Doing so for a silicone Doll, however, isn’t an issue; it’s just a matter of doing it. I remember when Abyss creations started issuing their RealDolls with neckbolts around 2003, and you could tell who in your local area had RealDolls living with them by the resounding HUZZAHs going up from our homes. Suspending a Doll from her neckbolt makes changing her clothes a much less arduous affair, as well as allowing her to ‘stand’ for photos and etc. Snowy and Bailes have stiff enough leg joints where they can stand generally unaided, but even when I have them resting against a bookshelf or whatever, I still get nervous due to the fear of them pitching forward. Just… just add neckbolts, please. Your customers will thank you.

It should be noted, too, that her joints are stiffer than I’d expected!… In speaking with Emma, she said that Jiusheng Doll can make Dolls with one of four degrees of posability: standard tight, extra tight, standard loose, and extra loose. I’d had Ursula made with ‘standard loose’ joints, and they’re still kinda rigid. She’s considering a regimen of exercise to help her loosen up. I’m left wondering what anything above standard loose would be like as far as stiffness, however… Perhaps in future, videos posted on the manufacturer’s website showing the various levels of posability, or lack thereof, could help their customers. It kinda ties into what I’d mentioned above about a Doll having stiffer knee joints for standing purposes, but being honest, I wasn’t having Ursula being able to stand in mind when I was putting together her order requirements.
You know what else would be nice? A clearly-defined range of movement chart, much like the one Doll Sweet have on their website! That way, customers wouldn’t have any surprises — good or bad — regarding their Doll’s ability to move and pose.

Last complaint: Ursula’s fingerwires are a bit underwhelming. Granted, they aren’t as weak as Dyanne’s, whose fingers are so weak she can barely hold anything heavier than a cassette tape, but the wires Jiusheng Doll use for the fingers could stand to be a bit more robust. How’s Ursula gonna hold her mobile phone? Or a machete??

Even though I regret not having her made with completely loose joints for a more relaxed posture, when all’s said and done, my assessment of our new Synthetik partner from Jiusheng Doll is: VERY SATISFIED. Don’t get me wrong; Abyss creations is and always will be the platinum standard for Dolls for myself and hundreds of other iDollators, combining fantastic sculpting and engineering to make an exceptional artificial companion, but Jiusheng Doll rates pretty high in terms of appearance, feel, and skeleton. As far as being a ‘starter Doll’ goes, for those of you on a tighter budget, I’d definitely recommend them. Keep up the good rubbery work, Jiusheng Doll!
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have go to wash a shit ton of black clothes while Ursula pokes around on her Twitter account. Apparently 98% of her wardrobe is just black clothes. As Goth-adjacent as the rest of us here are (except for Ms Bewboto), that’s pretty astonishing


URSULA: ‘No, don’t worry… unlike Snowball, I actually know how to use a chair.’
ME: ‘And yet…’

Random similar posts, for more timewasting:

Operation: Mapleleaf (2005 edition) on October 24th, 2005

Stuff / Nonsense on September 23rd, 2005


Just because she’s Synthetik, that doesn’t mean she’s perfect

typed for your pleasure on 30 August 2021, at 9.03 am

Sdtrk: ‘7→ (Boriginal)’ by Boredoms

Back in the early days of me embracing the iDollator lifestyle, I was quoted as having said that I’d like to have at least one Doll from each manufacturer in business, so among other things, I could write reviews comparing and contrasting them on this here blog here, for the benefit of others considering selecting a Doll partner of their own. Somehow what I didn’t realise is that with our flat only being 600 sq.ft, that’s not going to be enough space to comfortably accomodate me and a passel of rubbery women. At some point — probably just after Miss Winter moved in — I basically said that, short of us being able to move into a grander living space, I’d stop with five Dolls. All things considered, that would make for six of us altogether, which makes for good pairing off… an even number means no-one is left by themselves.

Earlier this year, I managed to get in contact with Juming, a representative for the Chinese Doll manufacturing company BBDoll. They told me that they’re attempting to make inroads into markets outside of China; they’ve been so far successful with Japan, where the company is known as CST Doll, and now they’re trying to crack the American/European market. As an aside, I should mention that I’ve no idea why companies change their names when they distribute from one country to the next, as it’s extraordinarily confusing. Admittedly I’ve no mind for the intricacies of business and commerce, but it seems to me that you would sell the same thing — in this case, Dolls — with each model of Doll having the same name no matter what country she’s sold in, and with the company’s name remaining consistent no matter what country it’s working in. I understand auto companies do that all the time (see the Opel Karl / Chevrolet Spark / Vauxhall Viva, as one example), but it hardly makes sense to me. But I digress!
I should mention that I initially contacted BBDoll, as I’d seen photos on Twitter of their extraordinary-loooking Mila-type, and I was thinking she could be a good candidate for my fifth Doll, embodying the spirit of Ursula, Miss Winter’s best friend from Brantford, Ontario. (I would’ve posted some shots of her here, but there isn’t a single photo of her that isn’t NSFW.) Through a series of DMs with Juming, they told me that their boss said they couldn’t just send me a Doll, but in exchange for a review, they could ship me ahead for free. I mean, ship me a head for free. Upon agreeing, they said they’d send me a Mila-type head with implanted hair, mainly so they could rightfully show off the look of a head with implanted hair. As it was free, I wasn’t going to complain.

After jumping through some hoops regarding the way the website was laid out — at the time, there were details which simply weren’t accessible; thankfully those issues have since been fixed — I ordered my Mila head on 01 June, and it arrived on 16 June, so pretty good turnaround time!


Place .gif of that scene towards the end of the film ‘Se7en’ here

It arrived in a corrugated cardboard box in a cloth bag wrapped with sellotape; inside was the head, with five plastic shields over the face, to provide protection.

The thing that struck me before even unwrapping the head was how heavy it is. It’s 6.2 lbs/2.8kg! To me, that’s pretty dense for a Doll’s head. Keep in mind throughout the previous three versions of my wife’s body, RealDoll heads have always been hollow plastic skulls with silicone faces attached to them. Elena and Miss Winter’s heads are silicone, but Snowy’s head is 4.4lbs/2kg, and Lenka’s head didn’t even wake up the scale, even after several attempts! It’s a shame that Oleg has since passed on, so I can’t Email him questions about the biology of an Anatomical Doll, but we’ve surmised that our Lenochka’s head is about 60% silicone, 40% foam; plus she has an actual throat, so that’s part’s pretty much air. Then there’s Dyanne, who can’t remove her head; or rather, she could, but she’d only be able to do it once. So she’s like an Organik! She won’t like that comparison at all.


The head showed up with braided hair. One of these days I’ll learn how to braid

In removing the cloth bag and faceshields, I was struck by how good the sculpting for the Mila face was! Her eyebrows are implanted as well, which is always a good thing, and her eyeballs have a similar spring-loaded system as Winter’s do, wherein the half-dome that is the Doll’s eye sits atop a large spring, which at rest pushes the eye against the inside of the eyelids. To reposition it, all her Organik has to do to move it is give it a gentle push inwards. It’s a really clever bit of engineering, honestly.


Take my word for it; there’s springs in those eyes. Which actually sounds horrible

And I will admit, her implanted wig is quite impressive! Personally, I’m not keen on implanted hair, especially in the context of the Doll that will end up being Ursula, as she’s slated to have a very specific haircolour — I bought a couple of wigs for her in preparation years ago — so the basic black that the Mila-type head was sporting wouldn’t suit her. But for an example, it showed that the staff at BBDoll had a committment to that particular stage of Doll construction, which is admirable.

However, in light of my experience with just a head from BBDoll, I have serious doubts as to whether a full Mila-type, alluring as she is, will be joining our family. First would be her heavy head, which is indicative that the company doesn’t yet use a similar method of making their silicone Dolls as most other modern studios, where there’s a lot of silicone-covered foam making up the majority of her head, torso, and limbs, thereby making their Dolls lighter in weight. Originally, I was considering the 165cm D-cup body, which would have my Mila-type clock in at 75lbs, or 34kg. As it’s obvious that I’m no bodybuilder, and I’m opposed to sweating/physical exertion in general (it’s gross), I’ve always said my ideal weight for a Doll is about 55 – 60lbs (25 – 27kg). My Missus’ Mk.I body was close to 100lbs/45kg back in 2000, and when Abyss creations started making their Dolls lighter round 2003, the iDollator community breathed a collective sigh of relief. 75lbs is pushing it, as I won’t go above 80lbs these days.

Really, though, that’s the least of the reasons in the Cons column for me; frankly speaking, the silicone is far too stiff. It almost feels closer to a plastic auto dashboard compared to my current Synthetik partners. This is easily the stiffest silicone I’ve ever encountered on a Doll, and I’ve been in the world of Dolls for over twenty years, fondling rubber women from a variety of companies.
A fact I’d been privy to several years ago, thanks to a bloke who worked at a Doll studio, is that silicone can be made in several different kinds of softness or firmness; the level of hardness is known as a shore. Write that down in your copybook.
Here’s a guide to shore hardness!

Apparently a bloke by the name of Albert F Shore invented a device known as the durometer back in the Twenties, which is used to this day to measure the firmness of silicone, rubber, TPE, any material, really. Cheese, metal, the soul of Man under Socialism, you name it. Regarding the lasses of BBDoll, they are made with up to seven different shores over a single Doll’s body, as seen here:


This is, of course, how a Predator would see a BBDoll

You’ll note that her face is listed as being a level 1 softness, whereas her breasts are the softest at level 7. I’m not saying that her face should be like a gelatin, but maybe more like a 2 or 3, according to this scale, would feel better; something not too soft, but obviously not too hard. For me, though, a Doll having a silicone face being that firm is a turn-off. It’s like how I prefer Gynoids with stretchable rubber skin covering their metal endoskeletons, as opposed to the unyielding metal flesh of, say, a Sorayama pinup model. They’re both enticing, but the latter definitely has a ‘not made for intimacy’ vibe. Upon reflection, the softness chart that’s posted on the BBDoll site doesn’t even show how soft (or not) their Dolls’ feet may be! I don’t like that at all.
Albert Ferdinand Shore died of a stroke in 1936. And they say you’ll never learn anything reading ‘Shouting etc etc’!

As a consequence of the very firm silicone for the head, plus the lack of oral ability, it’s impossible to receive a good, satisfying kiss from Mila. For myself and quite a few iDollators like me, we appreciate Dolls whose mouths open, as we enjoy sharing kisses with them. If you know anything about me, I don’t think of my Dolls as sex toys, I see them as partners and lovers, which has been the agenda that I’ve been pushing for years. Obviously being able to share a kiss with one’s affictitious lover is something that would attract a person to a Doll even more, so a mouth that doesn’t open is a turn-off.

Remember how I’d mentioned the Mila-type’s spring-loaded eyes? I still think it’s a great implementation, and more Doll companies really should follow suit, but when I want to move the eyes of Miss Winter, I use one hand to open her eyelids further apart from each other, and use my other hand — well, finger — to swivel her eye round. The reason for this is so that I don’t accidentally mess up her delicate eyelashes, which only makes sense. However, with the Mila head, since the silicone is as stiff as a board, that’s literally impossible. I mean, you could use the eraser end of a pencil to reposition her eye, but why not use the natural-born eraser-end sticks at the ends of our own palms that the Good Lord gave us?? *church organist starts playing*

In thinking about Organiks keen on bringing lasses from BBDoll home, I was considering a suggestion to Juming that the company should offer a sample of silicone on request, just as a number of Doll companies currently do, so they can feel the shore, as it were. But for one, BBDoll would have to send samples for seven different shores, which may not exactly be cost-effective for them, and another, thinking of my personal standpoint, say I receive a sample allowing me to feel the firmness of the silicone used for a Mila-type’s head, and I come to the conclusion that it’s not soft enough for me. It’s odds on that BBDoll aren’t going to change their mass production methods to satisfy one, or even a small handful of consumers. You click on the TV & Video app on the dashboard of the PlayStation 4, you choose, say, Disney+, to see what you want to watch, you futz around in there for a couple of minutes and come up with nothing, so you think, ‘right, let me check HBO Max’. So you back out… and instead of taking you back to the TV & Video app so you can select a different streaming service, it takes you all the way out to the dashboard. As much as I rail against that sort of ill-designed bullshit to my exhausted mates, they can’t do anything about it, and furthermore, SONY isn’t going to drop everything and pay one of their IT boffins to sink several hours of their time to reengineer their UI to accomodate one person. So there you are.
Yes, I have strong opinions about the way the PS4 TV & Video app is laid out; why do you ask??

Shi-chan and I have recently reconnected with a fellow iDollator from Japan, who goes by the name of t-dash. Back in the halcyon days of my Missus’ vanity site ‘Kitten with a Whip!’ from 2001 – 2004, we’d exchange omake (bonus) photos, to post onto each others’ websites. Due to life events, his previous RealDoll, Mai, had ended up living with another iDollator entirely, and t-dash fell off the radar for a number of years. Fortunately, he returned last April — still with the same website! — and with the stunning Yinan, followed soon after by her equally stunning twin sister Yinami, from the company XYCOLO Doll. He floated the idea of us chatting via Zoom once a month, and Sweetie and I enthusiastically accepted.


L to R: Yinan, t-dash, Yinami, me, the Missus

In our meeting this past week, which was just as fun and enlightening as the previous session, he’d mentioned that whereas my Dolls are partners and lovers to me, he doesn’t have the same relationship with his artificial lasses; to t-dash, they’re really just photo models. And I suppose this is something I’ve known about many fellow iDollators, but I’ve only somewhat internalised: not every iDollator is in a romantic relationship with their Doll. Which is fine, ultimately; if a Doll brings the Organik they live with a measure of joy and contentment on any level, it’s a good thing. So really, it seems that Dolls made by BBDoll, with their varying levels of softness, would be possibly better suited to being photographic models than intimate partners, such as the Mila-type that fellow iDollator Delage Fabrice has living with him. Which, although not my end goal for a Doll, is still fine. As it stands, Snowy and I share that sort of relationship; we’re not romantically involved, but we are good friends. This has nothing to do with the fact that Lenka would poison me if she caught me mucking about with her ‘little blue bat’; that’s not at all germane to this discussion. Ahem.

So I’m back to square one in looking for someone to be Deafening silence Plus Doll Numero 5. I do want to thank Juming at BBDoll for not only shipping me the Mila-type head for a public review, but for helping me come to the realisation that not all Dolls can fulfil all roles for all iDollators. Should I be on the lookout for a sixth Doll to live with us as a model, however, I’ll know who to contact


Seconds later, Snowy would put her index finger up Mila’s nose

Random similar posts, for more timewasting:

Stuff from Canada, music from Omaha on October 11th, 2004

Be a Good Consumer on January 14th, 2007


A return to stability, an ideal for living, and a new resident

typed for your pleasure on 23 May 2014, at 7.07 pm

Sdtrk: ‘A A A A A A R’ by Two daughters

It may be too premature to tell at this juncture, but it seems that Deafening silence Plus is back to a state of DEFCON 5. What that means is that I’m employed again. *overenthusiastic thumbs up*
Frankly, the entire ordeal has been a fucking nightmare, and has probably taken about a year off my life with worry. I’ve never been keen on rollercoasters, and securing employment, let alone decent employment, was needlessly difficult. By the time things ended, I was working with six separate temp agencies, who couldn’t seem to get me anything in the field I really desired — data entry — and the best two or three of them could offer were positions in call centres, or in sales. As you’ll already know, I’d spent nearly twenty years in various call centres, and returning to one would be akin to taking a Vietnam veteran back through time to 1970, to spend some additional time ‘in the shit’; the best outcome for that person would more than likely be suicide.

Oftentimes either I wouldn’t be able to find something suitable, or there were instances where a place would want to set up an interview, which I’d attend, and whatever prospective employer would end up choosing someone else. One of my favourite bits was when I went to an interview and totally aced it, but ultimately, I was told I’d have to cut my ponytail off and not wear earrings in order to get the position. It’d be one thing if it was something I really wanted, but this was for a call centre that was paying $10 per hour. Even the temp agent who organised the interview was baffled at their Fifties-era dress code requirements, so what does that say?
No wait, I take that back: the best bit had to have been when a temp agent scheduled an interview; it went well, they told me I was hired and report to work in a week, but between then and the start date, the agent then informed me that the employer had a hiring freeze take place, and I wouldn’t be able to start when I was due to. That happened twice. With two different temp agencies, serving two different employers.

Thankfully, however, I’ve had a full-time job now since late April! I work for a place… wait for it… doing data entry! It’s Monday through Friday in the morning — actually, they have flex time, wherein I can come in as early as 7.30 or as late as 9am — and I’m in a room with eight other people, entering data and doing imaging for a national health-related company. It’s dead easy and stress-free, I can wear my headphones, and it’s five minutes away from a place that sells sushi. Plus, it’s the highest paying job I’ve ever had, so needless to say, it’s a pretty fantastic gig. The only downside to it is that it’s a 20-25min drive to work, and with insidious rush hour traffic, it’s nearly an hour home. Sure, I’m catching up on my podcasts, but ergh. I’m going to try my damnedest to start getting to work at 7.30am, so I can circumvent traffic both ways. That’s gonna take some training, as nearly seven months of being on the dole has eroded any concept of a ‘normal’ wake-up time. But it’s nice being at a stage of my life where I actually like what I do at work! The drive, however… not so much. It’s all for a good cause, though; i.e, me keeping a roof over my head.

Apart from freaking out due to lack of job prospects, what else have I been up to, you axe? Among other pursuits, I watched all of Noel Fielding’s Luxury Comedy, a passel of episodes of the fantastic QI on YouTube, put a sizeable dent in my ‘anime that needs to be watched’ list, as well as seeing ‘The Lego Movie‘, ‘The Grand Budapest Hotel‘, ‘The Raid 2: Berandal‘, and Gareth Edwards’ ‘Godzilla‘ in the theatres with the miscreants I normally hang out with, so there’s that. (Each one of those films is highly recommended, in case you were wondering).
Also I bought a copy of the reissue of Joy division’s debut EP ‘An ideal for living’ on Record Store Day! After all, I had my orders.

Despite the fact that I have a modest vinyl collection, composed mostly of stereo demonstration records, we don’t really have space for a proper hi-fi here at Deafening silence Plus, so the EP is currently being displayed in our record frame in our flat’s ‘hallway’, as seen here.


MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

Upon reflection, I should’ve bought two extra copies, now that I see people on eBay flogging them from $40 – $60 apiece…

And the other major event was that my third Synthetik flatmate, Muriel Noonan, arrived home on 31 March! She’s from Coventry, used to work in a library, and is made by Textile Doll, the company from Latvia that I’ve mentioned a handful of times on ‘Shouting etc etc’. Expect a full review on her when I manage to get my post-work time sorted, but she likes it here, which is good, as we like having her here!

So that’s pretty much what’s been up with what’s goin’ down / In every city, in ev-er-y town. As I’m fond of saying, I have to get the barrels up to speed before I’m posting on what passes for a regular basis round here, but now that I’m no longer freaking out every other day for fear that I’ll have to move back in with my father for the second time, I should be posting again again! ‘Woo’, with an additional ‘Yay’

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So you just type stuff in here and it appears on the screen huh

typed for your pleasure on 13 December 2007, at 3.18 am

Sdtrk: ‘Jackie Onassis’ by Milky

Saturday! Traditionally known throughout history as a Day of Acquiring Knowledge and Stuff. And with my mates and I, that’s exactly what happened!

Our Algonquin End Table this Saturday past consisted of Jeff (aka Zip Gun) Derek et Steph, and Joe (aka SafeTinspector). We convened at Jeff’s digs at about 1.30, piled in D&S’s van, and sped off to the wild, largely uncultured city of Dearborn, as the Henry Ford Museum (now referred to as simply ‘the Henry Ford’, in an effort to make the place sound ‘hip’ and ‘with it’) had something we wanted to see: they were holding a temporary exhibit entitled ‘Best of Friends: Buckminster Fuller and Isamu Noguchi‘. Initially SafeT told me about it a number of weeks ago, and he and I had made arrangements to see it, and Zip Gun and D&S elected to come with, as it was something different from our usual week-end fare.

On the way to the Fuller/Noguchi exhibit, we stopped to look at the car John F Kennedy was assassinated in. Upon reflection, I should’ve gotten a pic of myself near it, for Extra Ballard Points.
Having looked through the info provided on the Dymaxion house, we had to actually queue up for about ten minutes for a guided tour, as there were quite a few interested people there with us as well. The Dymaxion house was, like a lot of Bucky Fuller’s ideas, startlingly ahead of its time. Essentially after WWII, there were hundreds of American soldiers returning home to find there was a housing shortage, while at the same time, aircraft manufacturers were laying off employees left and right, due to the decreased demand for fighter planes. Bucky Fuller presented a design that he’d been refining since the Twenties to the aircraft manufacturers that would solve both problems: by using excess aluminum material, he would retrain the employees into building homes instead of planes.

It was very ace thinking. The house was like an IKEA house: all parts were shipped in a rather large tube, and the whole assemblage took only three days to build — two days for the major assembly, and the third for installing the bathroom and electricals. As the home was built using cables suspended off an enormous central pole, not only could you raise or lower it, as it needed no foundation, but if you didn’t like where you lived, you rung up the builders, they came round and broke your home down, and set the whole thing up again in your new locale. 1000 sq.ft of self-contained living, featuring a gutter that collected rainwater for later use, ‘Ovolving’ (vertically rotating) shelves built into the walls for clothing storage, and other such fab amenities. Very forward thinking, especially for the late Forties. Unfortunately, as per usual, the general populace wasn’t ready for such a thing as kit housing, which is why the homes never went into production. The Henry Ford has one of the two prototypes in existence, and over the course of three years, restored it to its finery.
I regret not getting more pics of the house — the tour we were with probably had about fifteen people, so it was kinda cramped — but I did get this pic of the Dymaxion car, which was part of the Fuller/Noguchi tour proper, and as such, isn’t a permanent exhibit.

Four hours later, we made our leave. If we’d had more time, we would’ve gone to see the seat where Abraham Lincoln was assassinated, as well as the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile, but ZG had fatherly duties to see to. However, we made a brief stop in what passes for Dearborn’s downtown district, and hit up the comic store Green brain, as we were in the area. They’ve got quite a selection, although I didn’t see too much manga, but perhaps I just overlooked it. I did grab something that completely slipped under my radar: the trade paperback for ‘The gifting’, the all-new Tank girl series. When I bought it, I was a wee bit hesitant, as Jamie ‘The Hewll’ Hewlett wasn’t the artist — too busy working with Mr Albarn, undoubtedly — but art duties were competently handled by someone named Ashley Wood. Tank girl’s new character design wasn’t what I was used to, as sometimes it veered from somewhat sketchy to sub-Hewll, but since Alan Martin was still writing all the stories, it was just like meeting an old friend after a twelve-year long absence. A sweary, lager-swilling, heavy-ordnance-toting friend who lives in a tank with her kangaroo boyfriend. And we all know someone like that, right?
Our purchases duly made, ZG, SafeT and I dashed upstairs to Stormy records, to see what they had on offer. My purchase there? ‘Merzbear‘, by Merzbow. As it is, I’m gonna have to give it a good solid listening-to, as so far, it’s proving to to be wildly mediocre — too much like ‘Houjoue’ and not enough like ‘Oersted’. Masami, you’re killin’ me, man!

DAVECAT (flipping through the Merzbow section): ‘I can’t keep up with all of his releases!’
ZIP GUN: ‘Who can?’

Upon getting back to Zip Gun Towers, we split our separate ways for dinnair, as unusually enough, we couldn’t come to a decision as where to eat. SafeT and I filled up at Quiznos, then the lot of us (minus Steph, as she called it a day) returned to ZG’s, for several unbridled hours of Godzilla: Unleashed. I still can’t get entirely used to properly using those Wiichucks! This means I am old.

The end!

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Two week PURCHASING WHIRLWIND

typed for your pleasure on 20 April 2007, at 2.35 am

Sdtrk: ‘Die Wäscheklammern’ by Stereo total

After getting over a case of the 24 hour flu, which personally I’d never previously had and only thought they existed in films and television, I contracted a case of consumption (ho ho) as recently, I’ve purchased:

+ the trade paperback of Grant Morrison’s Sebastian O. Finally, a comic miniseries that asks the question, ‘What if Oscar Wilde was an assassin that lived in a steampunk London?’ Lovely stuff, but far too short

+ the 2-disk version of ‘The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou‘. Y’know, I think one of the reasons that I dig Wes Anderson as a director, is that he often uses the same typeface, known as Futura, in his films. That man loves him some Futura. I think I fell in love with Futura after realising that one of my all-time fave directors, Stanley Kubrick, used it wherever and whenever he could. Honestly, ‘Shouting etc etc’ is only in Century Gothic cos most people sadly don’t have Futura installed on their computers… I don’t see why not! It’s the Typeface of the Future, circa the Twenties!

+ Penny Arcade’s The Warsun Prophecies. Always a laugh riot, our Tycho and Gabe

+ the 40th anniversary Prisoner DVD boxset (comes with a full-colour map of The Village!)

+ I’m Alan Partridge – Series 1, which I know I shouldn’t have bought as Series 2 isn’t domestically available yet, and once it is, you’ll merely wait about six to eight months, and both series will be available in boxset form, cos that’s how they get you. Bastards

+ Vol.4 of Naoki Urasawa’s manga, Monster, a ‘taut psychological thriller’

+ Tomorrow’s Eve, by Jean-Marie-Mathias-Philippe-Auguste, comte de Villiers de l’Isle-Adam (his homies just called him ‘Cheezy-J’). As it’s a book from turn-of-the-century France, concerning a man who falls in love with a Gynoid built by Thomas Edison, it was obviously a book that I had to read

+ the RealDoll Complete Collection DVD, which was more of a gift exchange thing I’m doing with MaRi-chan‘s lad atsushi-san. (He also shipped me the first ‘Ergo proxy’ DVD. How generous!) In exchange, he’d like a Detroit Tigers baseball cap. Done and done, sir!

+ and finally, a stand for the Missus. I’ve yet to assemble it, as I’ve been busy playing catch-up on everything lately, it seems, but that should be on the week-end. Shi-chan’s been wanting to stretch her legs!

The slight irony behind all the DVD purchases is that my DVD player — the one that replaced my previous CyberHome that went tits up — has gone tits up. So now I have to acquire a new, sanely-priced, region-free player that converts PAL as well. Guh.
At this point, I have to retract my recommendation for the CyberHome CH-DVD-500 player, as pretty much all of my mates bought one, and pretty much all of them have expired unceremoniously. Maybe other CyberHome models are more robust, but I’ve no idea. This time, I’m thinking Malata, which is, by all accounts, the Cadillac of region-free player brands.

All of this mania is brought to you by Tax Return Cheques! WOOOOO

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typed for your pleasure on 14 January 2007, at 11.13 pm

Sdtrk: ‘memory one’ by The caretaker

The only fab thing about being employed again? The money. Or, as Winnie the Pooh might have it, the munny.

Over the course of the past three days, I’ve purchased
+ an airsoft MP40, courtesy of the Bay of e, so I can pretend I’m with the Wehrmacht. With the exception of the highly-coveted P90, my airsoft collection is complete

+ volume 2 of Ultraman, in conjunction with a $10 BestBuy giftcard that I received on Christmas. Initially my plan was to either buy the Prisoner thinpack, or the ‘Doctor Who: The beginning’ box set, but I forgot I was at BestBuy. ‘If it’s not brand new, or a hot item popular with the masses, we ain’t got it.’ Fuckers. O well, I wasn’t even really looking for Ultraman v2, so it all worked out

+ Borders had Emailed me, saying I had until 31 Jan to use up my Holiday rewards savings (a grand total of $7.63), so I hit the location near my work and grabbed volume 2 of Monster, and an Audrey Hepburn calendar for 2007. Not my ideal choice for a calendar, but 1) they were 50% off, and 2) that was the best they had left out of their remaining selection. Thankfully, I’ve always found Audrey hot, so it’s okay. But at the register, I was informed that I’d need a hardcopy of that Email I got, in order to use my savings, as they start tallying savings for 2007 after 01 Jan. Ergh. So I guess I’ll be using my $7.63 to buy Monster v3

+ Also within the same quarter mile as BestBuy and Borders was a GameStop, where I used some trade-in credit dating back to 2005 to get $20 off Samurai warriors 2 finally. The trade-in receipts were yellow and fading, much to the register biscuit’s astonishment. ‘Dude… were these printed on the Declaration of Independence?’ he’d asked. I chuckled

+ My hex key set that I’d ordered through the corporate gift catalogues issued to us at work arrived through the post! From now on, if I ever have a hex placed upon me, I can unlock it with no trouble whatsoever

+ Finally, be witness unto my New Cellphone.

No idea why the pic is blurry — more than likely, it’s due to Shi-chan’s complete inability to hold still — but yes, those are gaily-decorated human skulls as my wallpaper. (If you’re fully intrigued, you can download a copy for yourself from here.) But it’s a Treo Smartphone by Palm, which means that unlike my old Kyocera 7135, it’s smaller, lighter, has a faster processor, a built-in QWERTY keyboard, a 1.3 MP camera, a camcorder, and won’t crash like three times a week. Summation: it is a sexay machine.

So yeah! Stuff Week, or as the Germans might have it, Stüfwoch. O wait — now what the hell is this??

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typed for your pleasure on 1 January 2007, at 3.42 am

Sdtrk: ‘Music (In my mind) (Prins Thomas remix)’ by Lindstrom and Christabelle

My Saturday and Sunday comprised a good way to end the year, I’d say… Saturday morn Derek, Steph, Jeff, Mike and I piled into Steph’s van and headed out to Ann arbor, for our usual bi-bi-monthly shopping extravaganza. Jeff, Steph and I sold a passel of Cds and DVDs at Encore records; I was awarded $80 in cash, so I picked up Art brut’s ‘Bang bang rock and roll’ release. After that, we convened at Borders, where I purchased the first volume of Naoki Urasawa’s Monster, which is a hell of a manga series, and highly recommended. Up until now, I’d been borrowing Jeff’s copies of volumes 1 – 6, and it was just a matter of time before I broke down and started buying my own copies. ‘A taut psychological thriller’, as a book club would undoubtedly describe it.
Following that, we stopped by our favourite overpriced anime boutique, Wizzywig, where I bought one of the newer Evangelion gachapons (Unit 01, if you’re curious), as well as two different KOS-MOS figures. We then had a delicious luncheon over at the Japanese restaurant Totoro, and finished our day with a stop round to Vault of Midnight, where I… actually didn’t buy anything. It was one of those in-between periods, where there was nothing new out yet that I’d wanted, and I couldn’t find anything older in the store. They did have the Medicom Johnny Rotten figure for $20, but I’m holding out for all four Sex pistols Kubricks, all told. Ah well — money saved, I suppose… Nevertheless, a grand day out! We got back round 5ish and went our separate ways for the eve.

As for Sunday, I’ve just now gotten back (well, about two hours ago) from hanging out with my mates again, minus Mike, for the evening, playing a devastating combo of Apples to apples, Milles bournes, and some variants of poker. We were accompanied by Kari, Jeff’s wife, and Kari’s friend Ellen. I can’t remember how this came up, but interestingly enough, Ellen says that her best friend back at grad school played Missy, Bill S. Preston’s new mum from ‘Bill & Ted’s Excellent adventure’. How fab is that?? *does riff on air guitar*
Later on in the eve, I got a call from T-money that I put on speakerphone, so we could all yell at him, and apparently some ball fell somewhere in New York city. Really, it was much like last year’s festivities, which is quite alright, as we tend to swear by consistency. A heady evening!

Any resolutions for 2007? I haven’t made resolutions for about the past ten years, as I’ve been of the opinion that as soon as I say, ‘well, this year, I’m going to _____,’ then it’s pretty much a guarantee that it won’t be done. This year, however, I’m making an exception: I am going to get ‘Kitten with a Whip!‘ back up and running in some capacity before 2008. A single photograph and six lines of text do not a website make. Plus, Shi-chan’s getting cranky. Right right; you may laugh, but you don’t have to live with her.
Also, I’d really like to get everything sussed as far as ‘Shouting etc etc’, i.e., the things I’d mentioned a couple of posts ago. That one’s not really a resolution, by the way; I just thought I’d mention that.

So there you have it. Happy 2007, and best wishes for the new year!

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