Sdtrk: ‘Turritopsis’ by To kill a petty bourgeoisie

Links! It’s like likes, it’s like licks. It’s even a bit like lax!
I, ah, don’t know where I was going with that.

+ Having recently popped round the forum on Broadcast’s official site, hoping to find some news of a new album, cos with each release they lose a member, and soon, the band will be reduced to just Trish playing a theremin by herself onstage, there was a thread concerning groups that sound similar to Broadcast. Two bands that struck my fancy: To kill a petty bourgeoisie, which are kind of a more dissonant and soundtracky collision of the Sixties-era BBC Radiophonic Workshop sound with Shoegazer, and The new lines, which is headed by Hewson Chen, formerly of the late-lamented indie-synthpop duo Vitesse. I’ve been playing the hell out of ‘dc1’ and ‘th case fr public organisation’ on their Myspace player. And soon, you will be too! I guarantee it

+ Almost twenty years ago, David Lynch filmed a perfectly normal little television series called ‘Twin Peaks‘ in Snoqualmie Valley, Washington. Recently, some obsessive has undertaken a project to photograph various locations that were used in the series, to show what they look like now. If nothing else, you have to admire his determination

The Double R Diner, then

(Not quite) The Double R Diner, now

+ People with more time and scissor dexterity than myself are rather keen on papercraft, which is a hobby centred round cutting out pre-printed shapes, folding them up, and slotting them together, resulting in all manner of amusing objects. A prime example would be what you can find on cubeecraft. ‘Download, Print, Cut, Fold’ as they say there. They boast a growing array of characters in .pdf form as well, such as Number Six from The Prisoner, or Oh Dae-Su from ‘Oldboy’, or Brock Samson, or the Prince from Katamari Damacy, just to give a few examples. So why not fire up the ol’ dot matrix and assemble a couple of your favourite characters, instead of sitting on the Internet all day… o, wait

+ Have you considered the humble tetrapod lately? Have you??

photo by kana_m

Hit the beach anywhere in Japan, and you are likely to see endless piles of tetrapods — enormous four-legged concrete structures intended to prevent coastal erosion. By some estimates, more than 50% of Japan’s 35,000-kilometer (22,000-mi) coastline has been altered with tetrapods and other forms of concrete. Critics, who blame the tetrapod invasion on decades of excessive government spending designed to bolster the construction industry, argue that in addition to posing a danger to swimmers, surfers and boaters, tetrapods actually accelerate beach erosion by disrupting the natural processes that shape the coastal environment. Meanwhile, others have developed an aesthetic appreciation of the tetrapod landscape, as evidenced by a host of stunning Japanese tetrapod photos on Flickr.
from a post on Pink Tentacle

I’ve always thought tetrapods were cool, but then, I would. Frankly, I’m surprised that there aren’t like significantly scaled-down versions that you could buy to use as home accents or whatnot. Think of it! Toy tetrapods! I’m hoping someone will take that particular ball and run with it

+ For nearly a decade, I’ve always gone on public record as being in love with the city of Toronto, Ontario, and wanting to eventually move there. But lately, I’ve been reconsidering. For instance, with the weather being as polar as it’s been in Michigan, what godforsaken arctic winds would I have to put up with the further north I were to go? So these days, my party line is Bye bye Toronto, Hello Milwaukee! And after viewing this informative video, I’m thinking I won’t be the only one to want to relocate there!

+ Finally, anyone who’s aware of my manias interests knows that I like squirrels. Not as much as cats, and certainly not on the level of one of my ex-coworkers who loved pigs and had about a billion pig-related pieces of ephemera all over her cubicle, but I think squirrels are endearing little critters. To that end, I give you (not literally) a purple squirrel.

STEP ONE: soak squirrel in bucket of grape Kool-Aid

Purple squirrel baffles experts
telegraph.co.uk | 12:38AM GMT 22 Dec 2008

A purple squirrel which appeared at a school has baffled experts who are unable to explain its colour.

Teachers and pupils at Meoncross School in Stubbington, Hants, were amazed when they saw the creature through the window during a lesson.

Since the squirrel, now nicknamed Pete, was first seen, it has become a regular fixture at the school but no one has been able to say whether the animal has fallen into purple paint, had a run-in with some purple dye, or whether there is another explanation.

Dr Mike Edwards, an English teacher, said: “I was sitting in my classroom and looked out the window and saw it sitting on the fence. I had to do a double take.

“Since then it’s been a bit of a regular at the school – everyone’s seen it.

“We thought it might have been paint or something but then when you look at it up close, it’s an all over coat, not in patches like you’d expect if it had been near some paint.

“Its fur actually looks purple all the way through. It’s an absolute mystery.”
the rest of the article is here

Looks a bit Photoshopped to me, but anything’s possible in this day and age, really. *coughthatcatwithtwosetsofearscough*

So you lot can keep yourselves busy with those! I might try to pop off one more post before the end of the year, but I’m going to give upgrading to the latest WordPress a go, so wish me luck that it doesn’t turn out like the last time I tried upgrading without proper adult supervision. Man. *shakes head*
In the meantime, Happy (belated) Festivus, and Happy Holikwanzimasnukkah! Hope it’s enjoyable for you all! And don’t forget that the Doctor Who 2008 Xmas special is on tomorrow, for those of you who have access to that sort of thing. Allons-y!

Sdtrk: ‘The November men’ by Death in June

Greetings, new readers who’ve arrived at ‘Shouting to hear the echoes’, due to the link provided by Korea Beat! For the record, that post that sent you here? It’s riddled with errors. Riddled. This is what occurs when you use a blender to edit your articles. Let’s go over the highlights with a red pen, shall we?

The Real Dolls, made of a material similar to silicone, really look and feel just like a real person. And at 40 to 50 kilograms they even weigh as much as a woman. They can wear makeup and the more expensive ones can even eat.

Y’know, if I could get Sidore to cook for the pair of us, that would save so much time. Maybe she never learned how cos I never taught her, durr hey?

It is becoming increasingly easy to find men overseas with similar stories. 34-year old Dave of Detroit, in the United States, keeps a blog about his daily life with his Real Doll. They take walks together, eat together, and share secrets in bed just like a real married couple.

I can just see us attempting to do that. Either I’m blithely dragging her along by one arm, or hoisting her onto my back for a ride, and killing the pair of us.
And for the record, that’s Davecat, not Dave. Davecat, Esq. Well, maybe not esquire, but I’m working on it.

Here, the article’s broken up by a couple of pics of Synthetiks who are clearly CandyGirls, and not RealDolls. Another mark for lack of research!

He confessed his feelings about loneliness and the Real Doll. “I was always alone ever since I was a child. I think it was because of my appearance…”

Initially, people could handle my two sets of horns and prehensile tail, but then one Summer, I developed a row of glistening black eyeballs across my forehead. For some bizarre reason, that put people off!

“Suzi (the name of his Real Doll) is the first woman I had sex with and she does everything I want…”

Suzi? SUZI?? How the hell did they parse Sidore into Suzi? Did they just stop translating at the first letter and randomly select a female name that also starts with ‘S’?
And unfortunately Shi-chan (the first Synthetik woman I had sex with, just so you know) doesn’t do everything. She’s categorically refused to allow me to use her as a table or a chair, in the style of Allen Jones, for example.

“my mother, who is deceased, really wanted me to meet a girl but I think she understood that with the doll I’m not so lonely.”

Actually, unless Korea knows something I don’t, mum is above ground, and doing quite well. I spoke with her yesterday, as a matter of fact. No ouija board or scrying-glass was needed!
Also, they may be confusing (or just fusing) me with Everard, whose mother has in fact passed, and has said things to this effect in ‘Guys and Dolls / Love me, love my Doll’.

Men who only date their Real Dolls are mostly people who trouble fitting in to society. Because of their appearance or sexual experiences they live at home, with few friends, let alone a girlfriend, and purchase a Real Doll to solve those problems and have it them be their friends and lovers. On Dave’s blog he once wrote, “our conversations are one-way but even so I feel thankful to her.”

*facepalms* Where do I even begin with this paragraph?? It’s 95% bullshit!
For one, I think that once you have a Doll, you’re not really dating her — you’ve pretty much skipped that whole process entirely.
My favourite bit out of that cavalcade of conjecture though, is that quote I ‘wrote’. Take a moment to plug that phrase into the Search engine of ‘Shouting etc etc’, and see if you can find it. Go on, I’ll wait.
Did you find it? Heh, neither did I.

And the final paragraph,

Many people are unable to understand how they can treat a doll as their girlfriend. But the only way for them not to be that way is for us to understand them. When we understand their feelings there will no longer be dolls in their beds.

Ahh, but what if a person wants a Doll in their bed? Or did I just blow your mind??
A good spur-of-the-moment analogy would be that some people enjoy Coke, and some people like Pepsi. And then, there are those of us who love Dr pepper. There’s not a thing wrong with Dr pepper; it’s simply another type of beverage…

Anyway, you can find the undissected work of fiction-disguised-as-fact here. It’s left me more amused than angry, if nothing else, but there’s so much mistranslation/appropriation/fanciful bollocks that I’m left wondering if this article came from North Korea, and not the southern half. As we all know, North Korea has their own, shall we say, unique, take on reality

Sdtrk: ‘Get closer’ by Valerie Dore

It must be Winter (not officially, as the Winter Solstice hasn’t taken place, but nevertheless), as I’m currently losing my voice and fighting a flu with my bare hands. In between extended seven-hour naps, however, I managed to nominate the original version of Actroid, ReplieeQ1-san, to Carnegie Mellon’s Robot Hall of Fame.

A vote for Actroid is a vote for a Sexy Future

It seems that they hold induction ceremonies every two years, and I’d missed the one for this year. The nominees can include both real and fictional robots, such as Osamu Tezuka’s titular Astro Boy (inducted 2004), and Sony’s late-lamented AIBO (added 2006).

Here’s hoping that a) they choose to nominate Actroid-san, and b) the people will do the right thing and vote her in. Actroid in 2010!

Technorati tags: Carnegie Mellon, Robot Hall of Fame, Osamu Tezuka, Astro Boy, AIBO, Actroid, ReplieeQ1, Android, Gynoid, robots

Sdtrk: ‘th case fr public organisation’ by The new lines

Why yes, I say; a bollockload! Yet another Synthetiks developer has entered the open market; this one from Hong Kong. It seems to be less of a staff, and more of some bloke, but his their company is called the Hong Kong Human-Robot Center. Currently, they have two models available — the Gynoid F1, and the Android M1, who happens to look exactly like the company’s head roboticist. Admit it, you’d make an Synthetik duplicate of yourself if you had the means to do so. There’s some footage of F1 on the site proper, and man, is she blabby.

The robots of M1 and F1 were life-casted from the inventor directly. We use a new life casting technology and our created materials to simulate human skin, the elasticity and the skin color. If the make-up technology is combined, the simulation is higher.

The inner structure includes simulated bone 、mechanical joint、special servo motors and central unit etc. The central unit has built-in MCU with our developed special program which can control 16 different directions of servo motors at the same time、 DTMF system and 3G mobile etc. The robot is operated by using batteries without air pump connected, also provides power safe mode. We will continue to increase the activity joint and the function of the Human-Robot and make it to be more perfect.

The movement of the robot can be remote-controlled by telephone with correct password entered. You can hear the nearby sound of the robot on the phone, talk and move through the robot’s mouth, and watch the surrounding of the robot if 3G mobiles are used. It also provides the automatic mode and manual mode for your selection to control the robot. Voice/pattern recognition system, or optical motion capture system can also be applied for human-robot. […] We offer low price and accept custom-made order, rental, any collaboration for robot development / training couse.

Going from the above paragraphs, they’re definitely aiming high. I mean, their claim alone of being able to control your Synthetik through your phone, as well as using him or her for a telepresence, is a bold one, but could you imagine the ahem teledildonics ah-hem potential? That’s some serious Ghost in the Shell-type stuff there — being able to speak and act through a proxy body. Fantastic idea, actually. Of course, I would suggest the company hire a better sculptor, especially if they’re fulfilling custom orders, as the F1 model is a wee bit… lacking in aesthetics. Onward and upward, though — good to see another individual having a go at getting more Androids and Gynoids into society! I sent him an Email enquiring about his work, but I’ve not heard from him yet. I blame the language barrier.

On the Doll front, overachieving Japanese Dutch wife manufacturers Orient industry plan to release a couple of products round Xmas, such as a thermo-blanket for your CandyGirl, a USB-based ‘hole warmer’ (it’s exactly what you think it is), and yet another new model line, called Real Love Doll Ange; one of their lasses would be pictured below.

To be honest, she kinda looks a bit high-maintenance

She’s a wee bit over 5 ft tall, weighs in at 53 lbs, and has two body types: the B-cup size (30.22.34), and the E-cup size (33.22.34). This line not only seems to have the most realistic sculpting out of all the CandyGirls to date, but unless it’s due to smoke and mirrors, it appears she can stand as well. Yummy. More details as they unfold…

As it’s a new month, Phoenix Studios is maintaining consistency again, by releasing Miss November out into the world. She would make an incredible Xmas gift for a lucky someone! Or Hanukkah, for that matter.

‘If you squint, I disappear. That’s my superpower’

She looks like an icy lass, but approachably icy. Upon further scrutiny, she resembles a less-Gothic Dame Darcy, creator and artist of the lysergic neo-Victorian comic series Meat cake. Maybe someone should buy a Miss November, and make her up to look like Dame Darcy. Strap a tiara on her head, put some butterfly wings on her, hand her a banjo, “Bob” is your uncle. *nods approvingly*

Also, Miss Autumn, another one of the luscious Seasons models, is making her debut.

Her earrings look heavier than she is

As savvy followers of iDollator culture will undoubtedly note, her photoshoot was done by the fabulous Stacy Leigh. What, Miss Autumn’s makeup and the background didn’t tip you off?
Two more Seasons Dolls left! I’m still scratching my head as to what Phoenix Studios’ gameplan will be after Miss Spring is released next year. Perhaps that’s precisely how they want it…

Back on the Gynoid tip, there’s a new anime series currently airing (although it has a nail-biting release schedule of one episode every two months), that centres round the sociopolitics of Androids and Gynoids in a near-future Japan. It’s entitled ‘Eve no Jikan’, or ‘Time of Eve‘, and as Mari and I viewed the first two eps last Friday eve, I’ll inflict a review of sorts on you lot in a post or two…

And finally, as it’s my birth month — woo and yay Scorpio — I’ll note here that I’m playing to type, and I’d love to have this bumper sticker, designed by rstevens, of Diesel Sweeties fame.

Just putting that out there, y’know

Technorati tags: Android, Gynoid, robots, Orient Industry, CandyGirl, Phoenix Studios, Boy Toy, Dame Darcy, Stacy Leigh, iDollators, Eve no Jikan, イヴの時間, Time of Eve, Diesel Sweeties

Sdtrk: ‘Where’s Bill Grundy now?’ by Television personalities

Spotted this spectacle today, whilst out and about. Someone want to explain to me what I’m looking at here?

A unicycle. What, is two wheels too bourgeois for you, sunshine??

Sdtrk: ‘William, it was really nothing’ by the Smiths

It had to happen eventually. Actually, this sort of thing’s happened before, but I can’t locate a link to a previous reported instance at the moment. So won’t you just facepalm along with me, and read this instead?

Japanese murder investigators fooled by life-sized sex doll
Justin McCurry in Tokyo
guardian.co.uk | Tuesday September 02 2008 17:12 BST

Police in Japan have been left red-faced by an apparent murder that turned out to be an unusual case of mistaken identity.

It began in the morning with a frantic call from a couple who had spotted a “corpse” while out walking their dog in a mountain forest in Izu, central Japan, the ZakZak news website reported today.

Fifteen officers were dispatched to the scene, where they discovered a human form wrapped in plastic and tightly bound around the neck, midriff and ankles, with hair protruding from one end.

The body was left untouched and taken away for examination, and the crime scene duly secured by a police cordon.

Back at the local police headquarters, officials notified reporters who had turned up early the same morning to cover an annual earthquake drill. They began preparing to write up the launch of a major murder investigation.

Dozens of extra officers were dispatched to interview potential witnesses, while the evening edition of the local newspaper carried a report of the gruesome find, complete with a photograph of the body’s resting place.

By mid-afternoon, the body was in the hands of police pathologists. But when they sliced open the wrapping, they were confronted not by a decomposing corpse, but by a life-sized sex doll.

A police spokesman apologised for the commotion but defended his officers, saying they had simply been following protocol by leaving the concealed “body” untouched until it was in the hands of pathologists.

Though no crime had been committed, the spokesman could not resist admonishing the doll’s mystery owner. The doll, he told bemused reporters, showed signs of repeated use.

“Our guess is that the owner didn’t want to take a risk by throwing it away with the rest of his rubbish,” he said. “It was an incredibly irresponsible thing to do.”
photo source is here

Going by the detail and the skintone of her (very cute) feet, she kinda looks like either a RealDoll or a My Party Doll. Frankly, the pathologists should’ve consulted a professional.
Ahem.

The way I see it, this silly fuckwit had five options. He could’ve:
1. sold her (yes, there’s a market for that sort of thing)
2. given her a decent burial
3. run her round to Shimizu Kannon-do in Ueno park, where Orient industry consecrates Doll souls twice a year as a Buddhist memorial service
4. wrapped her up, flung her into the woods, waited for the subsequent CRAZY MEDIA EXPOSURE, and giggled for a week straight, or
5. sent her round to Ronald Dotson, as I hear he could use the company.
Can you guess which one our idiot friend went with?

Wow. Someone just won some bonus punches, as far as I’m concerned. Not out of spite or anger, mind you, but purely to teach him an abject lesson

EDIT (19 SEPT): A pleasant follow-up!

Sdtrk: ‘Silver sands’ by Stereolab

Sometimes when I oversleep, my subconscious tends to get all crazy. Of course, I mean moreso than usual.
I’ve just awakened after having a dream that Franz Ferdinand‘s Alex Kapranos was half-jokingly teaching me how to box. Now Franz Ferdinand’s music is pretty fab, but somehow I don’t really picture Alex being the next Sonny Liston. So he’s probably at about the level of boxing skill I could muster, frankly