Roll up your windows

typed for your pleasure on 25 December 2006, at 2.46 am

Sdtrk: ‘With every heartbeat’ by Robyn (feat. Kleerup)

WARNING: I’m subjecting you to another one of my dreams.

Steve (a former roommate), Marika (Shi-chan’s Organik sister), and I (me) were driving in my car to some motel, for some reason or other. The temperature outside was warm but not too unpleasant, so I’d had my rear windows down halfway. After pulling into the parking lot, we all got out; I was going to make reservations, and while that was occuring, Steve said he was going to go do something, and Mari was going to hit the adjacent Sunoco for something to drink. ‘Right, we’ll meet back in ten minutes,’ I said. So I headed into the hotel office — it was rather dingy, and it reminded me of one of those office trailers that you see on construction sites. Also, it seemed that no-one there was under the age of seventy. I went up the six or so steps and entered; the office was small and custard-coloured, but had a clear view of the parking lot. I saw the manager and his wife, who again had to be too old to be doing what they were doing, and I’d said, ‘I’d like to reserve a room please…’ then in looking out the window over the manager’s shoulder, I spotted a woman and her two sons. Their car was parked next to mine, and the mother had simply opened my left rear door, and pulled out a large framed Evangelion poster from my backseat. She was speaking to her two sons, who looked to be around six and ten, and they were nodding approvingly.
‘Ah, excuse me, I’ll be right back, someone’s, uh, taking something out of my car…’ I then bolted to where she was — she had just placed my poster in her back seat and was getting her kids back in the car, and I have to add that none of them were in any great hurry, bizarrely enough.
‘Ahh, what the fuck are you doing with my poster?’ I’d said to the mum. She was probably about 4’10”; I somehow sussed that she and her kids might’ve been Filipino.
‘Oh, uh, I’m sorry,’ she replied. She wasn’t freaked out or anything; she seemed slightly embarrassed, but it was more as if she was just inconvenienced. I reached into the back of her sedan and pulled out my poster, and also, without being seen at all, I spotted an LP on the backseat and took that, hiding it beneath my poster.
As she and her sons were getting in, I remarked, ‘You might want to get out of here before I call the cops.’ She turned backwards in her seat to reverse, and while she was engaging in that, I managed to surreptitiously break off her left side wing mirror.

Steve & Mari came back a couple of minutes later; I told them what happened, and they were aghast. ‘One of you has to stay with the car now,’ I’d mentioned, ‘while I go and get these reservations taken care of. ‘I’ll do it,’ replied Mari, and Steve followed with ‘I’m done, so I’ll stay here too.’ So I headed back into the office, which now contained around seven or eight other old people; most were milling around, but a couple were seated on a bed without sheets which was in the back corner of the already-cramped office.
‘Sorry about that,’ I’d said to the manager, ‘Someone was stealing something right out of my car.’
‘Yeah, there’s been a lot of that lately,’ he replied. ‘Times are rough these days, you know?’

So yeah! No idea what to make of that. As per usual. It’s a shame I didn’t realise it was a dream, as I could’ve laid a spinning piledriver on that mum; that would’ve been amusing.

In the meantime, Happy holidays, you ingrates. 🙂 Go listen to the new Ricky Gervais podcast!

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Artifice, real and simulated

typed for your pleasure on 23 December 2006, at 2.49 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Senza fare rumore (Demo)’ by Calle della Morte

Two brief things: ran across this series by photographer Juergen Specht last night, and I thought I’d share the love with you. The setup and execution are brill as it is, but the subject matter is definitely relevant to my interests…


Juergen Specht’s ‘The Doll

Simply gorgeous. It’s a bit NSFW, but then, the best things in life always are…

And the Other Thing would be a couple of new videos uploaded to Sidore’s Dailymotion.com account, which is easily accessible via the clicky button labelled ‘Synthetiks videos’ beneath the header. If you’d seen my YouTube account, they’re nothing new, but they may well be new to some of you. Or perhaps something distracted you, and you weren’t paying attention!

O, and the Good People at MyPartyDoll.com have a handful of new pics of their luscious Leeloo model up for viewing. Now, if only they can get her weight below 112 lbs. Egad, that’s a handful.

Well, I suppose that would be three brief things!
‘Shouting to hear the echoes’: Sometimes, mistakes are made

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Anyone fancy a saveloy?

typed for your pleasure on 23 December 2006, at 2.35 am

Sdtrk: ‘Attack of the ghost riders’ by the Raveonettes

Not altogether too wide off the mark, I’d say…

What Withnail and I Character Are You?

Perhaps I should start drinking! Or at the very least, cover myself in Deep Heat until the pubs open

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It’s entirely true

typed for your pleasure on 19 December 2006, at 11.46 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Rice 3’ by Merzbow

CHILD (answering phone): Hi, daddy!
ME: Heh… I hope to never, ever, ever, seriously hear that coming from a child’s mouth.

That’s not the first time that’s occurred, either. Now and again during my work duties, some errant toddler, labouring under various assumptions, will answer the phone, and I’ll end up shuddering visibly for five minutes. Hideous.

Who’s your daddy? Apparently I am. Happy now?

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Bring me the head of Alfredo Garfielda

typed for your pleasure on 19 December 2006, at 12.04 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Zelzah’ by Medicine

Jeff/Zip Gun sent me this intriguing article yesterday. Normally, I’m against vandalism, but I’m behind this 100%. That’s one hundred one per cents!

Town’s Garfield statue decapitated 2 months after installation
Chicago Sun-Times | December 18, 2006

MARION, Ind. — Police say someone stole the fiberglass head of a Garfield statue located near downtown’s Riverwalk.

‘’I’ve got to believe that whoever did this is probably going to be bragging about this at some point,’’ said Marion Deputy Chief Cliff Sessoms.

The statue is now a headless figure dressed in workout gear and giving the OK sign. Police are investigating, but said Friday they don’t have any leads yet.

Belinda Hussong, the city’s parks and recreation director, said she was disgusted to hear about the vandalism to the statue, which was unveiled in October.

‘’You put so much energy and effort into a community project, then this happened,’’ she said.

Marion is in the home county of Jim Davis, the fat cat cartoon’s creator.

The statue was put along the Riverwalk to promote exercise, wellness and riverfront activities.

‘’We had a lot of generous sponsors to the statue and I feel like we should replace it,’’ Hussong said.

Good to see I’m not the only person out there who reaches for their gun when they hear the name Garfield™®


Clearly, the best Garfield™® strip Jim Davis never made

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Don’t go teasin’

typed for your pleasure on 18 December 2006, at 2.10 am

Sdtrk: ‘Do you love?’ by Final fantasy

Ahh, if only…

Beyonce Knowles Is An Actroid
Skirmisher.org | Saturday, December 9th, 2006

I’ve had the hots for Beyonce Knowles for as far as I could remember, and this recent “unmasking” of her real identity, proving that she isn’t human at all but in fact Kokoro’s much-touted advanced version of the Actroid DER2, doesn’t even damp my filthy enthusiasm.

Undoubtedly, she bolted backstage shortly afterwards to reattach her face, before it peeled right off. That’s quite alright! Sometimes that sort of thing occurs with older Gynoids; she can hardly be blamed. Underneath her silicone skin, she’s more than likely built like Kobalab‘s Android SAYA, as seen here.

See how there’s hardly any velcro up by the temples? That might explain why her face got all rumpled. Easily seen to, but understandably embarrassing when you’re out in public.

Don’t be ashamed, Beyonce! We all know that Gynoids are cool

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WELL COMBE

typed for your pleasure on 13 December 2006, at 12.01 am

Sdtrk: ‘Panic’ by the Smiths

Hallo there! So d’ye like what I’ve done with the place?

You are looking at the sum total of a week’s worth of work, give or take a couple of days. Many, many thanks are due to MontiLee, aka Penda of the Diner, for helping me set up my WordPress account and getting me well on my way to true Mania. She’s been working with (and sometimes struggling against) WordPress for a number of years now, so she knows what she’s doing. Or, at the very least, gives an air of knowing what she’s doing. I owe you a dinner, babe!

So! Allow me to take a moment to point out the sassy new features of ‘Shouting etc etc Mk II’:

+ Note the picture behind the header at the top of the site? Jamming repeatedly on your keyboard’s F5 button will swap out the pic with various other Davecat-related pics. Synthetiks? Tiny Sixties Euromobiles? Err… Synthetiks? Test your luck with the Magickal Incredible F5 button!

+ CATEGORIES, baby; sexy categories. Makes looking for posts on assorted topics oh so much easier. Each category, if you’re perplexed, has descriptions that pop up if you hover your pointer over them. And if you absolutely can’t find what you’re looking for, there’s a Search function just below them. And unlike the search engine in this blog’s previous incarnation, this one actually works

+ A larger typeface, cos the micro-style one of the previous blog was getting on my wick

+ Century Gothic! Cos unfortunately, most people don’t have the font ‘Futura T’ installed on their computers

+ (Slightly) Larger pictures

+ (Ab)use of the ‘Open link in new window’ function. Now see, personally, since I’m clever enough to use Firefox, I just open a lot of links in separate tabs for later inspection, cos that’s much better than having a herd of windows fighting for space on your desktop. We’ll see if I continue to use that or not…

Also, I’m no longer with YouTube! Well, I’m no longer hosting videos there, as they’re afraid of artificial humans, apparently. So my lovely Synthetik partner Shi-chan is taking the reins, and hosting the clips over at Dailymotion.com. As they’re based out of Europe, they don’t have any problems with seeing bOObs at all, so you can now view what got YouTube into an apoplectic fit by clicking on the ‘Synthetiks videos’ button just beneath the header. Easy peasy!
The move to WordPress still has some bugs to be ironed out, however:

+ So far, I can’t get all your lovely HaloScan comments to import. I’ve got them saved, thankfully, but so far, I’m at a loss Finally done with that particular task, praise “Bob”

+ As far as the links, I still have to indent them properly and place them in the order that I desire

+ Really, everything in that sidebar needs to be indented

+ I require clever little icons for each category, cos I’m anal particular like that

+ Getting descriptive text next to each link in the Synthetik companion types category, just like in ‘Shouting etc etc Mk I’

+ Gravatars need to be implemented again. Of course, it would help greatly if Gravatar’s servers didn’t crash if you merely thought of them. For fuck’s sake, people; really.

So if anyone out there has any formidable WordPress skillz, do let me know, cos I’d greatly appreciate the help, as those Codexes can be intimidating sometimes. In the meantime, ‘Shouting etc etc Mk II’ will be a work in progress. Hopefully that path of progress won’t be too lengthy, but won’t you take my hand, so we can walk it… together?

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