Pisse et vinaigre

typed for your pleasure on 15 December 2004, at 11.17 pm

A couple of days ago, I was wasting time on das InfoBahn doing vanity searches for both my name & Sidore’s name, and one of the Sidore-related links was a site called mangoat.net, that had a mini-review of ‘Kitten with a Whip!’, under the title ‘real doll creepyness (sic)’. Here’s the article in its entirety:

01/28/2004 Entry: “real doll creepyness”

Great mother of Snuh?, I think I finally found the worst site on the internet.

I.. I just don’t know what to say. Be careful clicking that at work.

/shudder

Sure, sometimes bad press is better than no press at all — one of the two comments for his post read ‘Woah…she’s hot!’ — but I had to say something. Hence, fueled by a mix of ire & curiosity, I wrote goatman back..

To: Mike Kremkau (mangoat@gmail.com)
Subj: RE.your 28 Jan entry “real doll creepyness”

Hi there, Mangoat!

Davecat here, maintainer of the website ‘Kitten with a Whip!’, and boyfriend to Sidore Kuroneko, the Goth RealDoll. I was doing an MSN Search on ‘KWAW!’ and stumbled across your witty posting. Suffice to say, being called the ‘worst site on the internet’ is a bold statement. What about it did you find bad? Was it the layout? Or was it the content? You don’t really go into specifics, so I’m at a loss, here. Care to explain? We’d enjoy hearing from you..

Cheers,
Davecat

About two days later, the erudite philosopher goatfucker sent his riposte:

To: lamia_doll [at] hotmail [dot] com
Subj: Re: RE.your 28 Jan entry “real doll creepyness”

Dude, you have a site dedicated to the life and personality of a fuckable latex sculpture of a woman. Plus, you really need to drop the tables, or at least make the borders invisible. Also, choose a better font and text color because my wife can’t read the site at all.

So I fired back with this missive that same evening:

To: mangoat@gmail.com
Subj: I guess we can’t all be as clever as Mangoat

Okay, so let me guess:
1) You don’t like fiction, or the development of fictional characters.
2) You can’t appreciate beauty, whether it’s artificial or not.
3) Sex without emotional baggage doesn’t really appeal to you.
4) The simple concept of a person spending their time to create a website around a subject that they enjoy, one which does no harm to anyone, makes you cringe.

As for your table complaints; no, I won’t be dropping those, unless you can come up with a better solution for me. And I happen to like dark colours such as black, dark blue & purple, so the colours are pretty much staying. If they’re too dark for you, I would suggest turning the brightness up on your monitor. Or just do what I do on sites that I think are too dark – highlight the text.
As far as the font for ‘KWAW!’, it should be Arial; if you’re not seeing it in that, check your browser settings. I would’ve used Futura T Light, but not everyone has that installed, and I refuse to use serif-based fonts. In short, if you don’t like ‘Kitten with a Whip!’, don’t visit it. I’m sure you can find other sites to mock.

Shi-chan & I say thanx for your input! We will give your comments the attention that they deserve.

Cheers,
D. & S.

And so far, I’ve not heard anything else from Goatfucker Towers. A tragedy. 😐

Ultimately, I could not physically care less if a person thinks Dolls are creepy, or if they think I’m a freak for owning one. It’s not as if I’m going to leap out of my seat and sell Shi-chan right there and then, just cos I don’t fit into some fuckwit’s concept of ‘normalcy’. Personally, I tend to think a lot of anti-Doll comments (made by males, anyway) are done so out of jealousy. And normally, I’m not a vengeful person — I may make the odd threat occasionally, but very rarely do I follow thru with them. Once in a while though, it’s extraordinarily satisfying to hit back, especially if you know you’re in the right

Random similar posts, for more timewasting:

Please pass the suicide on January 3rd, 2005

Ceci n’est pas un 'Transformers: Revenge of the EXPLOSIONS' review on July 3rd, 2009

4 have spoken to “Pisse et vinaigre”

  1. Penda writes:

    The perils of ego surfing.

    Ah, the RealDoll version of “You are going to hell you heathen Witch. God Loves you.”

    A few things:

    Riddle me this Batman – And if it’s such a freaky site, why is his wife complaining she can’t read it? Oh – it’s horrible, the humanity – hey make the font bigger. Was she trying to make out a serial number so she could order her own?

    Your right – he is jealous. He’s saddled with a wife that probably looks like a pig that’s gotten into the cosmetics counter at Marshall Fields, and while he’s surfing for anything give him something kin to arousal that he can hang his …um..hat on while he attempts to screw his wife, he stumbles arcoss your site, but the font color and size of KWAW make it too difficult to masturbate, so he writes to complain about it.

    Loser.

    P.S. set the border to zero on the tables and they’ll be invisible. You know, if you want to.

  2. Davecat writes:

    But I love those tables! I handcrafted them myself out of fine HTML!

    Yeah, it struck me as being odd that he went out of his way to mention that ‘his wife’ can’t read the site. Well then, why didn’t she Email me? Maybe her hooves prohibit her from typing intelligibly. It could happen.

    People kill me sometimes. There’s always gonna be humans strapped into unhappy relationships that are boiling over with jealousy cos they chance upon happy Doll owners like myself. Shrug. Maybe if I drank more, I’d have lower standards, but then I’d have to change my name to mangoat, too. Or would that be ‘mangoat Two’?

  3. Neo writes:

    Whoa! It is hard to believe people have such little lives to complain about those of us who have lives, have taste, can create art and enjoy beauty like that of our beautiful Real Dolls. Davecat, you voiced your reply to “mangoat” with clear logic, laced with sarcastic bits of wisdom. Good show!

    The strangest thing about mangoats complaint: Mangoat’s wife cannot read the text? Why was she so interested when he said it was the worst? Odd. But then again, if they cannot extend some understand to us “freaks” who live in the dark (either by choice or otherwise), then perhaps they are the odd ones, not us.

    Keep up the good work Davecat, and KNOW that you have moral (and even immoral) support from your friends out here.

    Cheers,

    Neo

  4. Davecat writes:

    Hey Neo –
    Thanx for the backup!

    Personally, if it were up to me, I’d spray him and his ‘wife’, like you spray a bad kitty.
    PSST PSST ‘Don’t be a fuckwit!’ PSST PSST ‘Get off the Internet!’ That sort of thing. 🙂

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