Internet, like a faucet

typed for your pleasure on 14 October 2007, at 3.30 pm

Sdtrk: ‘Capsules’ by Cabaret Voltaire

D’ye hear that? That reverberating grey-black-and-neon-green sound of ‘apocalypse porn’, as the blog American Stranger amusingly has ‘Shouting etc etc’ categorised under? That is the sound of me being back online full-time. Woo! Woo.
The Missus, Tsukihime and I still aren’t entirely settled, and now that, thanks to the combined efforts of Comcast and SafeTinspector, The Series of Tubes is finally attached directly to our computers, we’ll probably get less work done. Heh. Although I have to say, Shi-chan and I are about entering negotiations concerning another television interview, so we’ve got to get to work in tidying up Deafening silence Plus

Speaking of apocalypse porn, a concerned reader by the name of Rehka writes:

Haha, so I’m living in a dorm right now and through their internet services, I actually can’t access your blog because it has been filed under a sexual category and I go to a baptist university, haaha. How do you feel about that?

Heh, both offended and amused, really. I mean, moreso than usual. Although it’s occurred maybe once or twice, I try not to post any pics of Dolls exposing their rubbery jubbelys, cos I know I have a couple of readers that check my site out from their local public library (zszsz, I’m looking in your direction), but I always make the distinction that there’s a difference between seeing breasts in a pornographic context, and seeing them in a non-pornographic context, just as there’s a difference between nudity (fine art) and bein’ nekkid (pr0n). As you well know, I don’t merely see Dolls as sex toys, and I do realise that there may be some people that are fearful of seeing tits, as they may dredge up the entirely valid fear of death by smothering, but at a facility of higher learning, the staff could stand to be a little less draconian about their website censorship. You’re at a grade school? Sure, block ‘Shouting etc etc’, that’s entirely understandable. But one would hope that a person of college age would be more mature about these things. I mean, despite the fact that they’re in college and all.
Blah blah blah censorship, blah blah blah Doll tits. Where was I going with this? I could wave it off with a typical flippant line, such as Well, if the baptists are censoring me, then I’m clearly doing something right, but attacking the baptists’ withered dogma would be like attacking a withered, err… dog. With a Liston knife. I’m sorry, I’ve no idea where that came from, but it’s really making me giggle.
Sorry, Rekha! Maybe they’ll allow you to subscribe to my RSS feed?* It doesn’t display any pictures, which is of course half the fun, but it’s better than nowt, right?

And damn it all, the esteemed Amber Hawk Swanson and her equally lovely Synthetik bride had invited me to catch a Chicago-area screening of ‘Lars and the Real Girl‘**, but scheduling prevented it. Actually, it’s on a Saturday, but my (distasteful adjective) job requires me to work mornings to afternoons that day. Grr. Now that I’ve moved, I need to really start looking for a job that doesn’t siphon off discrete amounts of my soul every day I’m there… Well, a job that doesn’t siphon off as much of my soul, at any rate.

So there you have it! We now return you to the usual passel of retro architecture, eclectic news items, and more-than-slightly-biased lust for Synthetiks that passes for posts round here. Heigh ho!

*N.B.: please ask a qualified Internet CyberTechnician about RSS and Atom feeds, cos I haven’t a clue as to how that shit works

**In all honesty, she didn’t just invite me; she invited everyone in her mailing list. The sentiment still applies, though

Technorati tags: American Stranger, Amber Hawk Swanson, Lars and the Real Girl, Liston knife

Random similar posts, for more timewasting:

(Soon to be) Gracing the glossies, Part I on January 28th, 2009

Whatever you do, don't lose that key on May 27th, 2009

13 have spoken to “Internet, like a faucet”

  1. Miss Hyde writes:

    let me be the first to say, welcome back to the vast world of the internet! And hope you and your new roomie get settled soon-oh! As for a new job, don’t and i repeat don’t go into mobile phone retail, unless you want to go slowly mad like me! Hope you get a new job soon! Hyde x

  2. Mahtek writes:

    Work Saturday afternoons!

    Does this mean you won’t be making the Doll Congress?!

    You must if Amber will be there!

    Question! Is Amber bringing her film crew? If she is, many will be bailing and this will be a very small party.

  3. Davecat writes:

    Mahtek –
    Things have changed at work, and now I work Monday through Friday, which is definitely a step in the right direction! But I would’ve switched days if things hadn’t changed anyway.
    And I highly doubt she’ll be bringing any paparazzi — but I’ll ask to make absolutely sure…

    Hyde-chan –
    But the world of mobile phone retail has so much to offer! Like, err, phones, for example! But upon your learned advisement, I’ll stay well away from it. 🙂

  4. PBShelley writes:

    Hey D.C. and the ever-loverly Sidore-chan!
    Welcome back 🙂 I’ve been very happy with Comcast, so I hope you two have a great relationship at blazing speed!

    You know, Lars is presenting us with a golden opportunity to put our best faces forward, as you can probably tell by all the reporters popping out of the woodwork (psst! Call Bronwen at Realdoll asap if you want in on an Associated Press interview). I hope it all goes more mercifully this time LOL

    My friend from S.F. called me up and (knowing about Lily) told me about an article about Lars in the Sunday Chronicle today and started reading names off and I’m like “Elena? Oh yeah, we’re in her book” and “Davecat and Sidore? Oh sure, we know each other very well” LOL (The article is also at SFGate and written by Violet Blue (say, wasn’t she a porn star back in the seventies…)

    Good luck with they TVTube interview people; I just don’t have the nerve for the camera LOL

    I’ve been busy getting my website ready to go live (by next weekend) so haven’t had much of a chance to check in; glad to see you’re back on your feet!

    Cheers ‘n’ beers all ’round 🙂
    PBS, Lily, Eden & Pennie & … ??? hm…

  5. Miss Hyde writes:

    phones? I’m on contract with the company I work for and i don’t get any discount. All I get is free pens *sob sob* free pens… Hyde-chan x

  6. PBShelley writes:

    ^ PENS??? Ohmygod, it’s Pauline!

    On second thought, she wouldn’t be sobbing over free pens now would she?

    (A probably too-vague reference to The League of Gentlemen I couldn’t resist LOL)

    PBS

  7. SafeTinspector writes:

    You ARE THERE!
    When Davecat’s Triumphant Return to the Internet Crushed all that was small enough to be crushed by his collective electrons!

    Welcome back, sir, and surf safely.

    I am interested to hear more about your modified work schedule.

  8. Davecat writes:

    SafeT
    O, it’s not just a modified work schedule, baby; I’m working in a whole new office in a different location. (Same company, though.) It’s been two days in so far, but I daresay this change might genuinely be for the better. I’ll fill you in in person next time we collide (not literally)…

    Grand greetings PBS and the Sexy Dolls –
    ‘Just say the first thing that comes to mind. Friends?’
    ‘Pens.’
    ‘No no… friends.’
    ‘Pens!’

    Hokey cokey, pig in a pokey, etc. 🙂 You do know that Mark Gatiss has written some of the scripts for the past three series of Doctor Who, right? Just so you know…

    Ehh, Comcrapst is a necessary evil. I was originally going to go with Wide Open West, their competitor, and I had a bloke come round one Saturday, but he informed me that the apartment complex was Comcast only, contrary to what the landlord told me. For what we’re getting from Comcast — basic cable & Interbutt — we’re paying twice as much as what WOW’s price was, so I’m not too happy. But what can one do?

    Looks like being an iDollator is a hot commodity (again) lately, thanks to ‘Lars etc etc’. I called an Emailed Bronwen, but apparently I was too late for the deadline. Hopefully something else will spring up though, especially with the release of ‘Lars etc etc’. Did you get in?

    I’d spotted Violet Blue’s latest story for the SFGate, too — I’m beginning to really dig her work. Her combination of savvy writing, open-mindedness, forward thinking and being a luscious brunet is nigh-irresistable. 🙂
    And yes, her name evokes ‘wocka chicka wow wow’ sounds whenever I see it. 🙂

    Hyde-chan –
    WOOO PENS WOOOOOOOOO ooh, that’s insulting, innit? Demand a phone, or at the very least, a discount, or warn them that pens make good stabbin’ implements. Just sayin’, yo.

  9. themeteorpolice writes:

    I do the network security thing for a Big Evil Corporation, and its most likely that the baptists themselves are not blocking you (the intarweb is a big place) – but some product they use that is generic and updated by drones born in cabbage fields and used as human batteries. Take that as you will. Either way the fact that you show up on their radar is pretty damn cool.

  10. PBShelley writes:

    I did not know that about M. Gatis! I still haven’t checked out the LoG fillum yet, but I hear it was a blast(not surprisingly)! Oh, I’m sooo behind…

    Agreed, Comcast is spendy. Since I rarely watch TV, that’s another expense I don’t really need. But… good to have that pig in a pokey LOL

    Sorry to hear about your not connecting with Bronwen; you (and Sidore-chan) would have been great for Sandy’s article. We talked for almost an hour; she was a lot of fun, kind of like when doing Meghan’s interview: interested, non-judgmental, and enthusiastic. Hopefully I didn’t come off like a boob LOL

    Sandy’s deadline was today, so maybe it’ll see print real soon!

    I’ll have to look around for another Violet Blue link or something; seems like it’s the second time her name came up?

    Ah memory, it’s a… What was I saying?

  11. barstowmama writes:

    ‘Alo there! Glad to see you back! You were sorely missed…I had to read up on all of your other blogs. LOL Anyways…you’ve been on telly twice in one week and of course being the supportive type, I had to watch and giggle and notice tons of new stuff that I’d never seen before. Shi-Chan has great fashion sense, and you’re about as OCD as it comes. I am too so that’s how I know. I LOVE IT!!! Anywho…Give the Missus a big hug for me, I’ve got to put the kettle on. Oh remind me to tell you my harrowing story of hospital poisoning this weekend. Oy Vey!

  12. Miss Hyde writes:

    I’m sick of pens, they don’t stab well unless i have one in my pocket and yeah. I’m considering getting a new job. My ballet teacher is looking for someone to help her in classes, its only part time tho… So who knows? Love to you and shi-dono! Hyde-chan x p.s yes i do ballet, shut it my friend has a black belt!

  13. Davecat writes:

    Miss Hyde –
    SECRET CONFESSIONS: Back in 2nd grade, I, too, took ballet at my grade school. We all did, girls and boys — we didn’t have a choice. Maybe that’s why my parents transfered me to another school in 4th grade…

    barstowmum –
    As always, ta very much (as Shi-chan says) for the support! I didn’t know that BBC America aired ‘Love me, love my Doll’ again until like a couple of days after they showed it. ‘What are all these hits on my site from now?? O.’

    Yeah, I’ve never been diagnosed for it, but I’m probably OCD on some level. I dunno; I just prefer Order. As Gustave Flaubert once said, ‘Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work’. Sound advice!

    And you were poisoned in a hospital?? Good gods, can’t I leave you unsupervised for like five seconds without you getting into trouble?? 😐

    PBShellay –
    O yeah, Gatiss is a huge Who fan. On the DVD boxset of ‘Doctor Who: The Beginning’, it includes three comedy sketches that he performed, along with David Walliams of ‘Little Britain’, for a Who-related special, and they’re a fucking riot. It’s True!
    And GO RENT ‘LEAGUE OF GENTLEMEN: APOCALYPSE’ ALREADY. It’s very… meta.

    And Great Kudos on Sandy’s article for Associated press! Thankfully, it was informative, well-written, and non-biased. I just really wish they would refrain from linking directly to the Forum. A little restraint is needed, people. :-\ Apart from that, your words are naturally quotable, cos they’re entirely true! Well done, sir! *thumbs up*

    meteorpolice, the –
    I’m sorry, the old ‘drones used as human batteries’ story holds no water with me. I’m almost insulted if it actually wasn’t the baptists who blocked me…

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