‘It’s my own invention’, or, Five Dollar Bear

typed for your pleasure on 24 October 2004, at 9.31 pm

I’ve just forged a Bold New Taste Sensation! It’s a sandwich ov my own invention, and it’s beautiful. Take two McDonald’s hash brown patties and place them next to each other. Pour barbecue sauce atop one ov them (I used a packet from Burger King), then drop a slice ov crispy bacon atop that. It has to be crispy, otherwise the whole sandwich is roooined. Then take the other hash brown and place it on top ov the entire assemblage, and consume with vigour. With VIGOUR!! I call it the Sogo Nogo sandwich, cos it’s so good, but it’s just no good for you, I’m certain. I’m no dietitian, I have no idea.
If you want to try the ‘Western’ variant, replace the McDonalds hash browns with two Arbys potato cakes, and use their barbeque sauce. That’s food, baby!

For best results, wash it down with a beverage ov my own invention. You’ll need a container ov vanilla coffee creamer and a 20 oz ov Dr pepper. Wait until you’ve drunk at least half the Dr pepper, then pour the creamer into it (tilt the bottle at an angle to reduce the foam). If you wish to flavour a full 20 oz, you’ll definitely require a glass and another creamer (one creamer per every 10 oz), and you’ll have to add the creamer slowly & carefully, cos that shit will make the Dr pepper erupt in foamy flames. Or just foam, to be honest.

Delicious! And to think I’ve never taken a single cooking class

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4 have spoken to “‘It’s my own invention’, or, Five Dollar Bear”

  1. Patrick writes:

    Glad to be so inspiring 😉 I ..think.

  2. Penda writes:

    Potato cakes are disappearing from the menu at most if not all Arby’s restaurants.

    Trust me – the Woodward/13 Mile and the 12 Mile/Dequindre no longer carry them. Also, they are completely gone from the menus of Arby’s from here to Chicago.

    They also use leaf lettuce, instead of shredded – bastards. If I wasn’t so addicted to their Imitation Reconstituted Meat-Like Beef Product, I’d stop eating there.

    And if you keep eating like that, they’ll be able the drop fries with the grease squeezed out of your arteries.

  3. Zip Gun writes:

    Dude, I eat White Castles, and that sandwich/drink combo you described makes ME want to puke.

  4. Davecat writes:

    Monti
    Arbys is discontinuing the potato cake?? SEDITIOUS INBRED COMMIE BASTARDS. I’ll never eat there again!*
    *note: not actually true

    Patrick –
    it was either ‘Five Dollar Bear’ or ‘Four Dollar Bear’, which, frankly, wouldn’t have made any sense. 😉

    ZG
    QUIET YOU

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